How do you feel when you see other couples having a strong and lasting marriage but not you?
You feel bad, I understand.
Don’t worry you are not alone. So many people had or are still not figuring out why their relationship is not working.
The truth is that, so many marriages are on the verge of breaking up, even as at the time of writing this article.
My question is: Is this the wish of the couple? Do they want to break up after coming together in marriage?
Of course not:=}}
It is always every couple’s desire to have a sweet marriage, and family, but along the line, things start changing. The love they all once knew starts getting sour and eventually breaking up becomes the final result.
If your marriage is in this state, there is good news for you.
You can make your marriage strong again today, and you are sure to have a lasting marriage by following these simple steps that I want to share with you now.
It may not be a quick fix, but a gradual process.
One important thing to know about having a lasting marriage is that it is not a man only or woman only affair, I
Both of you must be involved and committed to making it happen.
When you work as a team, you will see faster results.
So what exactly is it that makes a marriage strong you may ask? It is no rocket science, but just love, understanding, and learning.
1) Have a positive mind about your marriage–
Always have a positive mind about your marriage. From the very beginning of your marriage, make up your mind how committed you want to be in your marriage.
This will make you always be on the repairing end instead of destroying the end. You already knew that you want the relationship to be a strong and long-lasting marriage, so whatever your spouse does, you simply call it a mistake and immediately look for a way to fix it, because you know you are committed to this marriage.
Just keep your mind on your main goal which is to have a happy, strong and lasting marriage.
Emotional intimacy is important in making your marriage successful. It is simply a sense of closeness with your spouse.
When there is emotional intimacy in marriage, there is closeness, there is more cuddling, more kissing, more communication between you and your spouse. The couple is found sharing more moments alone, maybe discussing their love for each other.
If there is no time for both you and your spouse to talk, then try and create that time, it will help to bring back the good times.
If you are lost in the sea about how to grow intimacy i your marriage, then follow these steps below.
Two can’t work together unless they both agree. You need to be a match with your partner to; build a strong family and so you should invest in yourself to become that strong individual needed.
Adding values yourself, to your wellness, as well as your personal development are all great contributors to your health as a spouse.
The moment you know that you are fully strong and the best of who you are, then are ready to build the intimacy you care about in your relationship.
Being available and spending time with each other brings you and your partner together.
Therefore, do everything you can to always spend time together irrespective of your busy schedule.
It is important to be you as you speak your mind in your relationship. It is imperative to always express yourself fully without focusing on being right, but be truthful.
You get angry when your partner hurts you, but you don’t take things to heart because you know that nobody is perfect.
Being open-minded in your relationship makes you interesting and urges your partner to be closer to you.
The couple who refused to be open doesn’t relate well, because they are afraid to be betrayed.
3) See your spouse as your friend–
It is better when you see your spouse as your friend instead of a husband or a wife. This will give you the ability to share more with him or her. Seeing yourselves as husband and wife makes it look as if one person is above the other.
According to John Gottman, a relationship expert and a professor at Washington University, “ Every happy relationship is based on a deep friendship.”
That simply means that friendship is the pivot of all the strong relationships, and couples who are friends have a good percentage of overall satisfaction as couples.
Best friends share things in common they love each other and love to play and enjoy together. That will be imminent in your relationship if you are friends.
Best friends believe and trust each other. Marrying your best friend keeps your mind at rest because you are sure that you can rely on him/her.
If you are your spouse’s best friend, you will realize that you don’t always, and when you fight, it doesn’t take you time to fix your issues and move forward.
You are also ready to know what always brings quarrels and you don’t avoid your troubles.
Because you are the best of friends, you understand yourselves better, and when it’s time to make big decisions that will profit your relationship, you are on the same page.
You see each other as one, and that gives you the power to deal with your problems, plan for the best, and work on your dreams for great success.
Working as a team makes your relationship easier and stress-free.
Communication between you and your spouse is very important. This simply means the ability to share feelings.
Always have time you discuss with your spouse how to move your marriage forward. Looking at the things you have done so far, think about the mistakes you have made so far and plan how to correct them and move forward.
I have written a post on how to communicate effectively as a couple and you can read it here.
I decided to add this because it is almost the worst enemy to having a happy and strong marriage.
Most of the time, the things that bring discord in marriage are those little promises we made to our spouse that we did not fulfill or maybe we forgot to execute them. In my marriage, I realized that I made promises that I did not fulfill, so when I made a new promise, my wife will not believe me.
Until I learn how to fulfill my promises, my wife refused to trust me.
Another way to have a happy and strong marriage is to learn how to forgive your spouse when he or she offends you.
Many people find it hard to say you did something bad to me but I have forgiven you. Since marriage is the coming together of different people from different backgrounds there are bound to be squabbles, but the ability to forgive and forget will make you keep moving as one.
If you are anxious to have a lasting marriage, you have made the right decision, however, you must be willing to work to actualize it. I have given you some effective steps that will help you get the best results.
I am sure these points will help you to have a lasting marriage or get your marriage back and happy again.
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