It is important you learn how to build emotional intimacy in marriage because it is one important tool you can’t do without if you want your relationship to succeed.
Of course, It is obviously the most valuable part of every relationship. Any relationship or marriage that lacks intimacy is as good as dead.
What Is Emotional Intimacy?
What exactly is emotional intimacy, why is it very important? Are you having emotional intimacy issues in your relationship? If so, how should you bring back emotional intimacy in your marriage?
If these questions are going through your mind now, don’t worry, because, in this post, I will answer all your questions, so stay tuned.
Wikipedia described emotional intimacy as “an aspect of interpersonal relationships that varies in intensity from one relationship to another and varies from one time to another, much like physical intimacy.”
There may be several definitions for emotional intimacy, but no matter how it is described, it is important to note that it is one of the most important keys you need to restore the word “US” in your relationship.
Signs Of Lack Of Intimacy
-You Are Growing Apart Consistently:
When emotional intimacy disappears in your relationship, you might notice that you and your partner are growing apart on a daily bases.
You will know that your partner’s feelings towards you have evaporated and you can’t understand what caused it, but you know that you don’t, spend time the way you use and you don’t relate to each other as before.
– Outsiders know you better than your spouse:
You may be under one roof, but you neither talk nor chat with each other, you eat separately, and prefer to tell your friends about your feelings than your partner.
Without intimacy, there will be a communication breakdown, and without communication, your relationship can never succeed.
In a fresh relationship, the couple doesn’t wait to call, chat or visit each other, so if these are not happening in your long term relationship, that’s a clear sign that emotional intimacy is lacking.
–There’s No Transparency And Communication As Regard Your Emotions:
When you are afraid to communicate about your feeling and your needs to your partner, it a red flag that intimacy is lacking.
The couple who knows how to say their minds freely and openly are much happier and connect better.
But that couple who finds it hard to talk about their emotions fight pretty often.
– No Support For Each Other:
Couples in supportive relationships know what it means to support each other and they do so always because they enjoy trust and understanding.
They also share their emotions with each other and therefore get the maximum supports they need.
When you find it hard to go to your partner for help, it means there is no good emotional relationship between you.
-When You Avoid Physical Closeness:
Physical closeness is a symbol of emotional connection. When it is absent in your relationship it a sign you are falling apart.
When you stop kissing, hugging, romancing, and having sex, you are making your marriage vulnerable to cheating and infidelity.
A good emotional attachment brings physical closeness.
Happy couples enjoy more closeness and connection all the time.
Can A Marriage Survive Without Emotional Intimacy?
How can a marriage thrive when everywhere is empty, and lifeless? The couple will be at distance with each other, there will be no time to talk, no time to hold hands, and even time to share feelings together.
I have seen so many marriages trying to go on without these feelings of intimacy, but over time, they crumble.
Marriages can only be held together when deep intimate emotional feelings are present.
If you are currently having challenges in your marriage, you should try and get those feelings back first.
How to build emotional intimacy in marriage.
1) Make Yourselves Comfortable at all Times:-
You have to figure out how your spouse loves to enjoy his or her time. Learn how to make your spouse comfortable any time you are together. Make him desire to be around you at all times.
A happy spouse who feels loved is the pride of their marriage because they put all their efforts to see that things work out well.
This is why you should try and do your part to improve your marital bond and always make your partner feel special.
The secret steps to ensure your spouse feels special begins from your mind and then it flows to your eyes.
The question now is how do you see them?
Most times, we become very busy in a relationship that forgets to remember our spouse’s feelings and needs, and that leaves then feeling neglected and alone.
However, if you want to rebuild intimacy in your marriage, then you should think of how to keep each other comfortable.
2) Forget And Move Forward:
You should learn how to forget your partner’s flaws in order to move forward in your relationship. They may have done so many things to you which lives no space for forgiveness in your hear, but really the only way to restore intimacy is to let go.
I know that it will not be easy to do, especially when it happens again and again, the best way is let go, after all, nobody is perfect and that includes you.
If you will one day wish your partner forgives you your flaw, then you have to start forgiving.
Here is why you must forgive
According to marriage experts, ” couples who practice forgiveness are more likely to have a lasting relationship.
Forgiveness also reduces lovers cholesterol level, reduce the risk of heart attack, and help you sleep well.
In order words lack of forgiveness can wear you down and cause sleepless nights for you, and it can affect you physically and mentally too.
3) Spend Quality Time with Your Spouse: –
Increase the quality of time you spend with your spouse. Make it unique and enjoying for him. Make him look forward to staying with you. The most couple feels sad when it is time to go home because they never want to go to a nagging wife or husband.
If your home is conducive, your partner will always crave to be home, but if not they will prefer to hang out with friends.
It’s important to spend time with each other as it will create an unbreakable cord. You will have a good time to discuss your relationship and sought out your differences.
If your partner refuses to come home on time due to how uncomfortable you made things be, you’ll not have much time and good discussions which will help your relationship succeed.
4) Constantly Admire Your Spouse: –
It is important you admire your spouse always. Appreciate him or her at all time. To admire in a relationship means to respect your partner.
To show your partner that you admire him or her, you stand for and respect whatever they believe in and understand the things that give them the utmost joy.
This ignites the fire in you that wants to rise to seek other ways to be their greatest “inspiration for admiration” higher level as you seek to be the inspiration for their admiration.”
The moment your partner understands that you have gone the extra miles to make them be the best, they also will love to be the best for you too.
Below are a few words to show your partner that you admire him or her.
1.” You mean the world to me.”
2. ” I bless the day I found you.”
3. “I appreciate how you take care of me.”
4. “You are my favorite person.”
5. “You are the best husband/ wife.” Etc
5) See A Therapist To Help You:
When a lack of intimacy becomes consistent in your relationship and you can’t do anything about it, consider visiting a marriage counselor for assistance.
The counselor knows how to help you deal with such problems because they are trained for the purpose. They will teach you some effective ways of communication that will be beneficial for you and your partner, and also help you deal with the underlying issues that can spring up in the future to destroy your bond.
After seeing the marriage therapist, you will be totally furnished to deal with some issue which would have been hard for you initially.
No matter how busy you are, don’t neglect to go out of your comfort zone to learn how to build emotional intimacy in marriage.
It is the blood of your relationship, and it is an important tool that helps you build a bond. Lack of emotional intimacy will cause disaster. Therefore concentrate on what will bring closeness, bond, and bring a good connection to your partner and you.
I strongly believe these points I listed will help you in your marriage as you start restoring intimacy into your marriage.
Understand that it is not a quick fix, but after you have learned how to build emotional intimacy in marriage, and then apply it to your own marriage, things will gradually start changing.