Marriage is an important step in life, but having a happy marriage is what every couple must strive to attain. This is the reason why careful steps should be taken to plan your marriage before your wedding so you can achieve a happier and stable relationship for the rest of your stay together as couples..
Why planning is necessary?
Properly planning will be the difference between success and failure. Quote by .Dwight D. Eisenhower
How do you feel when you heard the word “planning”? Many usually think it is unromantic when you said anything about planning a relationship or marriage.
They believe that marriage happens naturally; they think one needs only to follow his/her instinct, go with their heart, and that is enough to see them through marriage, yes! I guess so, too.
Yes! I also believe that every marriage must be rooted in love and romance because they are the foundation for a good union between husband and wife.
However, I believe also that it is important that a lifetime commitment as marriage should be carefully planned for a lot of reasons. I have a great day and
Every happy and successful marriage is a union of two people who put their professions, personal talents, aspirations, and knowledge together in order to be united as one..
When two different people coming together from different backgrounds; it will not always be easy for them to agree on a common opinion, that is the reason careful planning is important, so husband and wife should talk about the ways forward even before it happened.
Planning a marriage also strengthens the union between couples. Everyone sees himself or herself as a valuable member and then get committed to achieving a common goal.
If you are looking to find and marry a man of your dream, then I recommend this for you.
How To Plan Your Marriage Before your Wedding:
1) Have a heart-to-heart talk.
One of the ways you can plan your marriage before your wedding is to have a heart-to-heart chat with your would-be a partner about your plans to be together as a couple. Yes, this discussion is necessary, especially when you are planning to take your relationship to another level.
Always have in your mind that though the wedding is a joyous moment and a day affair, but marriage is a long time commitment, so plan yourselves together very well.
Consider asking yourselves these questions before marriage.
- Do you have any financial goals, and how can we achieve that?
- Is there any way I can help you when you are stressed?
- Do you want children, and how many would you want? What should we do if we struggle to have children?
- What is your communication style?
- What are your boundaries?
- How much time alone would you want?
- What are your joy triggers and your fears?
After asking and answering these questions, then you will know how prepared you are for marriage.
I will also suggest the following two important steps to help you.
Have a goal written down.
It is obviously the most important goal for you to have a stable marriage wherein you and your spouse are both committed to its achievement.
It is then more important you make other smaller goals that help you achieve your aim. Success is always the best motivation; those little complementing goals will motivate you the more to achieve your goals because you can see the fruits.
You can plan for weekend dates for you and your spouse, which helps to sustain the sparks of love that have been existing. You can also make it a point of duty to talk about your marital issues at the end of the day.
2) Be honest.
Another way to plan your marriage before your wedding is to be honest from the very beginning. It pays to be truthful when you are planning for a happy marriage. Honesty brings trust and lies brings distrust. Never say the wrong things because you want to win your spouse. Eventually, every lie will be noticed and trouble will start.
Below is a checklist of the effects of lies in marriage
- Lies Destroys trust and trust is the backbone of every relationship.
- It leads to other lies and deception, which will eventually destroy the relationship.
- Lying shows how selfish one is.
- It prevents great and empowering conversation.
When you consider all of the above consequences of lies in a relationship, you’ll see why you should desist from it. One of the reasons why lies destroy marriage faster is because of its nature of first bringing a distrust; and when your partner finds out your lies, they automatically become afraid of you, probably you’ll hurt him/her again.
3) Consider Going For Premarrital Courses Or Class:
To truly plan your marriage before your wedding, attending premarital classes or courses is a good idea. It will work best for you if you are still in the sea about what marriage really is. You will learn many things you don’t know about marriage there.
There are well trained counselors that are ready to answer your questions, train you, and also empower you with everything you need to succeed in your marriage. Thsy are well trained to help people, so don’t be afraid to ask them any question have. I bet you will not regret it.
Few Questions You Can Expect in Premarriage Counselor
- What do you cherish most in your relationship and spouse to be?
- Are you both on the same page about having children, and how many children would you want to marry?
- How would you relate to your extended family, so you don’t hurt your relationship?
- Are you on the same page about sex?
- What do spirituality matter to you?
- How did you plan for you to save and spend?
- Would you handle your finances separately or together?
There are so many other questions to expect from the counselor; all these are to make sure that you understand what marriage is all about, and also to help you to plan your marriage before your wedding.
4) It’s Time To Start Planning And Adjusting Your Finances:
To effectively plan your marriage before your wedding, you must also consider planning and adjusting your finances, to fit the new life you are about to live. Mind you that life as a single is different from married life; therefore it is necessary to adjust your spending habit, and imbibe the habit of savings.
The experts have found out that the money problem ranks number one as the most problem facing marriage. You wouldn’t want to be a problem with your marriage, too. Would you? Then start adjusting now. Choose to spend money on the most important things. Save more and, if possible, get a better job that pays more.
Another good thing to do to prevent money issues in your marriage is to be on the same page about money. Plan every spending and savings together. Be open about your earnings, investments, assets, salary, etc. This works better the moment both of you know what to expect and what not to expect from each other. So, start making changes now, you will love the results you’ll get in the future.
5) Start Setting Your Marriage Goals:
You can also plan your marriage before your wedding, by setting your marriage goals earlier, even as a single. The idea is to start listing what you want and not want in your marriage.
Many people think that marriage works on autopilot; well, it doesn’t, because you really have to put in some works to make it successful. Yes, love is there to bring you together, but the little continuous effort you put daily is what brings the success you desire. That’s where you’ll need to set goals.
Setting your marriage goals early will give you lots of things to work on as a single, in order to have success when you eventually marry. So start now, start setting your goal. You will not regret it.
I want you to understand that life comprises pleasant and also unpleasant surprises that usually beat even the most careful plannings.
However, making careful planning together as husband and wife can give you a step ahead in solving the problems that are yet to come. So devote more time now and plan your marriage before your wedding now, so you can eliminate certain challenges in the future.
To have the best marriage, you must have the best spouse too. To find a great man to marry, I recommend this