Many marriages failed for many reasons. Most times the couples are able to see the main causes of divorce in marriage starring in their faces, and yet overlook it, until nothing could be done about it again.
I had the pleasure to interview some couples about their own views concerning this subject matter and listen to what I got from them.
85% of them gave me the answer that marveled me. They said “if it is not because of childbearing, I wouldn’t have married” If you ask me, I will tell you that marriage is sweet if and only if you know what it takes to make it sweet.
Did you see what I said in that last statement? It simply means that the sweetness and the sour taste of your marriage depend on you.
One important thing you must have in your mind is that it can never be all that rosy. There must always be ups and downs. They must even be the things you will see that can make you want to run or divorce. The most important thing to note is that divorce is not an option when you see all these things.
You can actually work on your marriage and get it back on the feet again. However, you must get yourself acquainted with these things so that you know how to tackle it when it starts rearing up its ugly head. Below are the main causes of divorce in marriage.
The 10 Proven most causes of divorce in marriage.
1) When money stopped flowing the way it used to.
Money is very crucial in marriage. There are times in the marriage when money flows very well, probably because there are good jobs or good business that yields money.
At those times of income flow, there is always love and joy, all challenges about money are been solved, and all need are meet without much ado. However, there may be times that the money will stop flowing for some time as it used to.
Then many things start coming up; it is now shouts and quarrels. That is not the best thing to do. Always have in mind that one-day things will be better again. It doesn’t matter how long. It will be well again.
How to Restore Piece In Your Marriage
2) When he/she pays more attention to the children and not you.
Couples pray for the gift of children in their marriage. However, at times it looks as if the arrival of children brings about a reduction in the intimacy between them.
Yes, of course, now more attention is given to the children, that couples have fewer times to share together. A friend of mine went the extent of taking pictures with the children forgetting their mother.
Listen to what the wife told me when I visited them. She s, aid “ any time I look at those pictures, I feel like I am not welcomed here”. Would you rather want your spouse to have this thought?
Now listen to what you will do to save yourself the stress. Always show your spouse that he/she is important as well as the children.
3) When your Sex life becomes dull.
Sex is an indispensable factor in every marriage. However, there are times when it looks as if the sex life of your marriage has become dull.
Most of the common reasons for this are the disparity in the sexual responsiveness or libido of the individual partner. When this happens, the next thing to do is to try all you can to restore sex in your marriage.
4) When there is no more emotional intimacy.
There are times in the marriage when everything seems to become cold between the couples. This usually happens after so many years of marriage.
There is no more emotional relationship between couples, no more time for cuddling, no more time for affectionate touching, no more laughing or talking together. At these moments, you may want to divorce; wait! You can get it back again.
5) Lack Of Equality:
This has been proven to be among one of the greatest marriage destroyers and you must avoid it.
What does lack of equality mean? When your spouse sees him/herself doing more in your marriage than you do. This has destabilized so many marriage, and it is still causing harms.
It is amazing some times that many couples are not even aware of what harm inequality have caused to their relationships.
Inequality is the chief cause of resentment; when you become too angry about your partner not helping out in so many things, you’ll suddenly become hostile, and in some cases you become violent.
All these add up to make you overtly bitter towards your partner and you’ll also want to leave the relationship if it keeps happening.
The best solution is to play your part pretty well and support your spouse to get your relationship successful.
6) Physical Or Verbal Abuse:
“Only a tree will stand even when they know you are about to harm them.” Physical or verbal abuse are the same and they have wrecked many marriages.
Abuse has no part to play in any successful relationship. Abuse usually happens when you or your partner plans to dominate each other and you want to frighten your partner to submit to you with that.
Nobody wants to be abused, even your partner, and whether you are a man or the wife, desist from being abusive if you want to have a successful and stress-free relationship.
7) Physical Change:
Although this sounds absurd, and there is no justification for divorce, but physical changes can make one think of divorce.
Do not allow yourself to go out of shape, probably your spouse married you because of your nice shape. Now you don’t care about that again. You believe that doesn’t count after all.
You are making mistakes to think like that. Please, keep taking good care of yourself. Watch your diet, eat nicely, and avoid junk foods. Keep fit, dress appropriately. Remain the exact person your partner married.
There are many other causes of divorce in a marriage that I didn’t mention in this post. However, if you will discipline yourself to follow my advice in this post, you will not fall, victim to divorce.
The good thing is that most of these causes of divorce in a marriage can be prevented, yet if you have not been able to avoid it, then you can use the methods described here to deal with it.
Here is one of the ways to start keeping your marriage strong again if you’ve fallen short.