“I hate separation with all my heart, and I love my partner so much, that’s why I don’t want a divorce.”
This is what one of my readers sent to my email. What came to my mind after reading that mail was, Why would one spouse want divorce while the other doesn’t?
Isn’t there a way to solve this situation? Granted, there are ways to stop divorce, and I will show you how in this post.
If you have ever said
- “I don’t want a divorce.”
- “I don’t love my husband but I don’t want a divorce.”
- ” I don’t want a divorce but my husband does.”
- “I don’t want a divorce but my wife does.”
- “I am not happy but I don’t want a divorce.”
“I Don’t Want A Divorce: How To Stop Divorce.
S1) Consider yourself first:
Take a look at yourself in the mirror. Ask yourself if you are the main curse of the problems in your marriage. Are you the reason why your spouse filed for the divorce? What are your contributions on the ground? Maybe it is because you are not treating your spouse well. You will know better if the fault is from you: then make a U-turn. Instead of blaming your partner, take responsibility. That will help you find a way to change and then things will start changing if you change.2) Learn to forgive:
If only you could forgive your spouse, there may be peace. Most people find it very hard to forgive their spouse. Do not go out or go to bed having any grudge against your spouse. “Everyone makes mistakes,” so give him/her another chance. In the bible, God says that we forgive our enemy 70 times. That means to forgive all entirely. Don’t be a hard nut to crack. If you understand that you could make mistakes too, then don’t waste time forgiving.3) Remember The First Date Together:
Do you ever consider those good days when you first saw your spouse? How did you fall in love, how you could never wait to fall into his loving hands, how did you always want to feel the warm touches, the kisses, the hot romances you had together? This thought will make you say no I don’t want a divorce; I want to stay the rest of my life with this person.4) Be Sincere And Ask For Sincerity In Return:
Sincerity matters in every marriage. Try and be sincere to your spouse at all times and in all things. Be open and straightforward in all your dealings, whether your spouse is around or not. If you have skeletons in your cupboard, then you don’t have the power to judge your partner’s sincerity. It is only when you are sure that you are sincere, then you can ask your spouse for the same in return.5) Talk It Over With Your Spouse:
Communication is important in solving any problem. If you know what the problems are, then you can talk it over with your partner and find common ground. That makes the solution easier. Most couples don’t try to deal with the issues before going for a divorce. Be open to talking to your spouse about the current state of your marriage. Do not pretend there is no problem in the marriage. Communicate your feelings together and solve the problems. You can seek the advice of a good therapist if that would help you solve the issues.6) Pray About it:
Praying is always the first solution to every challenge. Prayers can change situations no matter how bad it is. Take some time to pray for your marriage. Pray for your spouse, pray for your children, and for every challenge you notice in your marriage. Remember you don’t want a divorce in your marriage and only God can grant your heart desire.7) Decide Your Commitment:
Now you are aware of why your marriage is going through the stress: if you are the reason, for the trouble, you should also make e effort to invest in the solution. That begins with your commitment. Look at all that you did wrong, all your mistakes, and make amend, Start doing all that will add value to your relationship and, let your partner know that you have changed for the better. Genuine repentance from you can make your partner change his or her mind.8) Know What You Want And Focus On It:
So many things will want to distract you from your plans about your marriage. There are absolutely tons of distractions. I, therefore, implore you to be strong and remain focused on your dream for your marriage. Don’t look at the thorn in the part, concentrate on the price that’s ahead. That will give you the power to move forward. Moreso, keep building and empowering yourself to be the best. You may not. See the results immediately, but you know you are working to get the best marriage you’ve always dreamed about.9) Get Your Financed Right This Time.
A report from Investopedia shows that financial problems are the leading cause of marital issues, If you consider the problems you are having in your marriage, you will also find out that money is the chief. That means you have to get your finances right this time if you don’t want a divorce. The best solution is to be on the same financial page together with your partner. Don’t overspend or mismanage your money. Buy only the necessary things. If possible, have a family account. If you can get this right, then you have solved the main marriage problems.