If you are looking for ways of fixing a loveless marriage, then this article is for you.
Are you feeling trapped in a loveless marriage where your love for each other died a long time ago? And now you are asking questions is it possible to stay in a loveless marriage? Or throw in the towel.
You are not alone in that, I have received countless emails from my readers, requesting me to show them what to do about that very issue; and especially to show them ways of fixing a loveless marriage.
If you are asking these same questions, then this post is specifically for you, as I will show you 4 ways of fixing a loveless marriage.
Frankly speaking, no one desires to experience being trapped in a loveless marriage, it can be too emotionally draining, especially when you are trying everything you could do day and night to connect, experience love, or even been noticed by your partner and not getting your way through.
When you look back, you could clearly remember those days when you were saying your vows at the altar, you loved each other so well in the first place to accept to get married to each other.
However, along the line, things start changing, and it became somewhat difficult to meet needs or take care of certain things that make marriage sweet.
Those unmet needs start making everyone feel rejected, unfulfilled, ignored, and not properly taken care of until the marriage became affected too.
The good news is that you can patch those holes and make your relationship sweet again, and I will show you how to do that in a short while.
Let’s get started.
What Are The Signs Of A Loveless Marriage?
How do you know that you have a loveless marriage? Well there are a few signs you will see in your marriage that will make you understand that things are no longer the same again.
So before you start looking for ways of fixing a loveless marriage, first look for the signs below.
a) All the Fun Has Disappeared:-
The best moments in marriage is when you play and laugh things up in your marriage. You spend time together talking, chatting, and playing games.
Those moments have disappeared, you disagree more than you agree on common things. You shout and yell at each other and no more time together and playing games.
Marni Feuerman, PsyD, a marriage therapist in Boca Raton says that ” a disconnect in relationships shall be linked with humor.” It is important to always find lightness whenever thing gets tough in your marriage.
Try to laugh more, because laughter heals. When you and your partner stops laughing things off, it show that both of you are not in good relationship again and you will need a help.
b) You Don’t Make Love Anymore:-
As couple, one of the thing that will hold you firmly is the combination of both the emotional and physical intimacy. According to Feuerman this is reserved for the two of you only.
Yes, it is true that your libido may not be the same, and may even become worse as the year goes, but when you sex frequency of your marriage diminish, one of you will likey feel unwanted and rejected.
That can cause resentment and disagreements, so don’t let that happen.
c) You Feel Lonely In Your Marriage:-
This sounds funny, but the truth is that you can be married and still feel single. I am talking about when you are with your spouse in the same roof, or even under the same couch and feel disconnected.
If your partner feels more concerned about their phone, laptop or other gadgets even when you are with each other; that’s a clear sign that love is depleted.
You will need follow the steps for fixing a loveless marriage as I have described in this post to deal with it, or see a marriage counselor for quick advice.
d) You Feel Neglected:-
Feeling neglect is one on the signs of lovelessness in marriage. It’s about either you or your partner feeling as though they are not been taken care of.
Lately, you realized that your partner doesn’t care a thing about your physical or emotional needs anymore. You are feeling unloved, uncared for, and ignored and the worst is that you are no more your partners priority.
That’s a red flag and you have to find a way to address that before your entire marriage is affected.
e) Keeping Secrets:-
Nothing kills a relationship like keeping secrets to your spouse. A successful marriage is all about openness, sincerity. So if you keep secrets, you are no more open to your partner.
It is often more disastrous when your partner finds out about the secret. Being honest will make your partner trust you more and trust is important in marriage.
4 Essential Ingredients For Fixing A Loveless Marriage.
1) Reject it: –
The first way to fixing a loveless marriage is to be ever positive, and one of the ways to stay positive is to refuse to accept it in your mind that your marriage is loveless.
Your definition of anything can definitely determine the result you will get about it.
The moment you accepted that love doesn’t exist in your relationship, your emotions and perception start accepting it as well as your health, and automatically everything about you starts taking shape to match your definition ( As a man thinks in his heart, so is he) hope you remembered the slogan.
Nevertheless, start thinking and speaking about the best for your marriage instead of negatively. The signs of lovelessness may be obvious.
Things May Be Chaotic:-
Your relationship is indeed passing through a hard time and you and your partner for one reason or another other have not been acknowledging each other, which created a big valley between you; now you are more of a roommate than a husband and wife.
I am not doubting you about it, but if you could keep an open mind about it and not place the label on it, you’ll see things changing gradually.
2) Understand why your marriage is the way it is: –
Another important step in fixing a loveless marriage is to understand why your marriage is passing through that stage.
There’s always a reason for everything, and there must be a good reason why your marriage is going through that right now.
Marriage can’t just become loveless all of a sudden.
Try to set your mind back and rummage on those things that keep poling you apart from your partner, how and when it started, you could find out that those little things have gravitated to that big issue you are facing now.
I’ve heard couples blaming it on each other, the men will say things like ” My wife has changed a great deal, she doesn’t listen when I am talking like before” and women also complain about the husbands too.
Having these in mind can greatly choke the goodness in your marriage away.
The best thing to do is to change your perception and your priorities will change as well.
Get back to doing those things you did earlier in your relationship that give both of you joy. If you can get them back, then you can get the passion back again.
3) Say your mind about the issues at hand:-
One thing you’ll do earlier to stop the problems from escalating is to summon the courage and tell your partner about all your dissatisfaction, and anger.
Let your partner understand that you are feeling neglected and unsatisfied.
Be open as you let him/her know everything that’s going on in your mind about the relationship and also let he/she know also that it’s okay if they feel the same way too.
Bringing this to the table will make you say your minds and the possible solution for fixing a loveless marriage could be found for the problems.
4) Increase Your Commitment To Your Marriage: –
If you eventually discover why your relationship is the way it is now, it’s imperative that you make up your mind to increase your personal commitment to your marriage.
Do more for your marriage now than before, and always look for ways to help your partner achieve their personal goal and dreams.
Give up those lifestyles that brought the disconnection and imbibe good behavior.
Remember, being more committed will help your marriage get better that it has always been.
If your marriage is loveless, you can still get it back again. Do all you think is necessary to achieve your goal.
I have listed 4 important recipes for fixing a loveless marriage here just to help you.
Now the ball is now in your court to take action. Remember, if you don’t take action you will not succeed.
Let me drop my pen here.
See you at the top
I am still your friend murphyaik.