Restore Intimacy In Marriage: 6 Things No Note

If you are looking for how to restore intimacy in marriage, you have made the wisest choice today. Although it may be a little hard to do, yet it is pretty possible to do that, and in this article, I will show you how to do it.

First, let’s get ourselves acquainted with why you lost intimacy in the first place;  because that’s the first step to restoring intimacy in your marriage.

Reasons For Lack Of Intimacy In A Marriage.

So many things can be the reason for the loss of intimacy in your marriage.

But, If you consider these 5 points listed below, you may be able to know what causes the loss of passion in your marriage.

There are they.

Rejecting Your Partner Sex Advances.

You may not know this, but if you have been rejecting your partner’s sexual advances, it may cause him/her to start withdrawing from asking for more.

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Not because he/she doesn’t want sex anymore, but because she doesn’t want to be rejected again.

My advice for you today is to quit that sex rejection now to avoid withdrawal.

No matter what reasons you may have for rejecting your partner’s sexual advances, always consider the negative effects it will have on your marriage.

look for other ways to show your grievances than to reject your partner’s sexual advances.

When There Is No Physical Intimacy.

Research shows that couples live happily and peacefully if they indulge in touches that don’t lead to sex.

Non Sexual touches are very important in a relationship and they help to create a bond in relationships too.

It has also been discovered that physical touches like hugs produce a hormone called oxytocin.

Oxytocin is known to be associated with happiness. In other words, a lack of emotional intimacy can make your partner withdraw from you, and when you are disconnected from each other, having sex will become a problem.

If you want to restore that, you have to make time to be with each other.


Stress is another big reason for the loss of intimacy in a relationship.

Sometimes, women find this hard to accept, however, every man may find it hard to perform when he is financially or physically stressed. Stress can also affect women. You can restore your intimacy by reducing the things that give. You stress.

Communication Issues

Communication issues are enough to sniff intimacy away from your marriage. It will create barriers in your marriage and prevent you from truly understanding each other.

When communication lacks clarity and depth, you will find yourselves quarreling always: which will also lead to unresolved conflicts and emotional distance.

Meanwhile, the inability to express your desires, needs, and concerns openly can hinder the growth of mutual respect and trust.

This communication deterioration not only creates resentment, it also creates a sense of isolation within your relationship.

To rebuild intimacy, you must learn to prioritize effective communication, and actively listen to each other. and create an environment for both of you to be safe and express yourselves freely.

Unresolved Conflicts: 

Unresolved conflicts or recurring arguments are another thing that can cause a toxic atmosphere in a relationship.

The toxic atmosphere is enough to erode your trust and emotional connection over time.

The lingering tension caused by unresolved conflicts creates resentment, making it challenging for you and your spouse to feel emotionally safe and connected.

This atmosphere of discord leads to avoidance behaviors, which means withdrawing emotionally or physically from each other, to avoid conflict.

Consequently, unwillingness to engage in intimate interactions deepens the detachment between you and your partner.
That will exacerbate the cycle of unresolved conflict and emotional distance.

The Effects Of Lack Of Intimacy

Below are some effects of a lack of emotional intimacy in your marriage.

Lack of intimacy makes your partner feel rejected and not taken care of, sometimes your spouse may feel like they are not sexually attracted to you anymore.

That can make them have low self-esteem and start isolating themselves.

Here is an article I wrote about the effects of lack of sex in marriage. You can grasp so many things from there.

It can be so disastrous to your marriage if you don’t tackle it on time.

Let’s look at some possible ways to restore intimacy in a relationship.

How To Restore Intimacy In  Marriage.

1) Spend More Time Together.

The first step to take if you want to restore intimacy in marriage is to spend time together as a spouse.

I know that so many are here for you to take care of, but believe me when I tell you that if you don’t create time for your partner and your marriage, you will have yourself to blame at last.

Try anything you can to carve out time. Again, don’t spend that time without making it memorable. Find some interesting activities that will give you pleasure as you stay together.

Here is a checklist of the couple’s activities at home to enjoy.

– Play a card, a dice, or a board game.

–  Learn a dance step at home.

– Subscribe for a virtual painting class together.

– Read your best book together.

–  Have some fun quizzes together.

– Share the story of your first date.

– Watch some of your best romantic movies together.

Just find some of the things that interest you and engage in them. It will add more juice to your marriage.

2) Communicate Nicely.

You can restore intimacy in marriage if you understand communication and how to do it effectively; if you think back to the old days of your marriage, you will understand that your problems started when you lost your communication ethics.

Moreso, communication is not just about talking and hearing someone speak, it’s about knowing the communication styles that will either help or kill your marriage.

Learn how to express your mind to your partner, and never assume he knows what you are going through: remember that nobody is a mind reader.

Always tell your partner how much you love him or her, they may not know it unless you say so. Then take time to discuss the issues affecting your love and relationship and also find solutions to them.

It is only through effective communication you can solve your problems.

3) Remember The First Love.

You can also restore intimacy in marriage by reminding yourselves of that love that brought you together.  Your marriage started many months ago or years ago in the great era of love, infatuation, and fantasies.

If possible, try revisiting those areas that boosted your passion, where the butterflies in your stomach all started.

Go back to the memory lanes and find them out, then start visiting those places and remind each other all you can remember about your early love life.

Those little things can make you fall back in love again.

4) Indulge In New Experiences.

There are so many ways you can restore intimacy in marriage that is not only through physical touch. John Gutman said that familiarity and closeness.

With that in mind, may I also tell you that by just doing new things together you can restore intimacy in marriage. 

It may be taking a new dance lesson, or enrolling in learning other languages.

If you are buoyant, then take a trip to other countries of your choice. These things are just to keep you connected as a couple. Being together will give you opportunities to fix your differences.

5) Be A Dynamic Lover.

After so many years in marriage, your ways of romancing your partner will likely become a routine if not completely dead.

Therefore, it will be fine if you can twist your routine often. Go the extra mile to intensify emotions again, by trying new things daily.

Be unpredictable, and learn how to surprise your partner always.

For example, book for unexpected trips to a nearby country, and nobody knows until the very day. Buy a surprising gift and plan a surprising wedding anniversary for you.

You’ll be surprised at what impact this will have on your marriage. 

6) See A Relationship Coach.

Most times, it will not be easy to identify the real cause of the problems in your marriage. But if you visit a relationship coach, they will help you identify them.

The relationship coaches are trained to solve relationship problems and also advise If you wish to rekindle the fire back into your marriage, then make up your mind to see a coach.

Here is an article I wrote on how to locate a marriage counselor near you.

In Conclusion:

If you want to restore intimacy in marriage, you’ll be deliberate about it; that will give you the push you need to do everything there is to achieve your aim.

I have described so many steps for you to follow, but know now that it will never be an easy path to tread, but it is doable and you will succeed if you put in more effort.

See you at the top. I am still your In-house counselor,  Murphyaik. 

Aik: AIK UCHEGBU is a writer and an authority in anything that matters about marriage and how to build it successfully. His followers have been greatly enhanced by his findings. You will not be disappointed by coming to this site.