Take a personality test
Understanding this will help you appreciate both the differences and similarities, as that will help you stop fighting over how different you are.
I suggest you take a personality test to understand what you both are made of.
Keirsey sorter’s tool found on the internet can be of great help to do that.
Understand why you exist
The personality test will help you know how you love to exist in this world.
After that, then make a decision to get to a point where you can show respect to your individual differences and find out what works for both of you, and also accept the difference in the personality and cease from condemning your better half’s personality.
Learn to give and receive pleasure:-
Quote on pleasure by Voltaire
“Pleasure is the object, duty and the goal of all rational creatures”.
Marriage works better when couples understand the act of giving and receiving pleasure.
Understand that it is not a one-way thing.
Many couples believe its only the husband’s right to give while the wife received love, but that’s not right.
Learn to give and take love
When you look closely at any marriage that’s successful, you will discover that both couples take a turn in giving and receiving pleasure.
Because when you receive pleasure, you are giving your partner the opportunity to give and vice versa, and that brings a balance to sex in marriage.
Here’s a misconception
The misconception here is that people think they are yielding to the “culture of narcissism” when they surrender and embrace pleasure. But that’s a lie.
Sexual pleasure becomes more excited when we stop worrying about who gives and who received it.
If you want to be the receiver, be ready to have the whole of it and don’t for any reason feel selfish.
So to increase the sexuality of your marriage, never be afraid to take up the role of the giver and also give it freely don’t withhold anything, while your partner receives with “abandon ”
However, always remember that it is better to give than to receive.
Having this in your consciousness always will make you want to give always. And if both of you become givers, then full sexual pleasure will be reached easily.
Talk about it
I implore you and your partner to talk to yourselves about how to get the best of sexual pleasure.
Feel free to tell him/her your sexual hot spots. Don’t be ashamed to ask or tell about yours, and make sure he/she understands.
Understanding this principle of giving and taking sexual pleasures will help improve your love life, and also take your marriage from friendship to soul mate level.
If you really want to make your marriage move from better half level to soul mate, then you have to take your time and work on it by following some points I listed in this post about how to create a soul mate from your spouse.
Marriage is about daily nurturing, if you fail to do the needful, then you will not get where you want to be.