Friendship in Marriage: 9 Powerful Ways to Deepen Bond

Let’s look at one of the most important things that can make any marriage succeed. We are all aware that romance is a significant part of any marriage. But many of us are not aware that there is something more important than that, which we always forget to talk about. I am talking about “friendship in marriage.”

Think of having someone who, more than anyone else, knows and understands you like your own DNA and who knows how to make you laugh with ridiculous, stupid jokes and silliness. Someone who always has your back no matter what, and you happen to share your lifetime with this person. You will like it, won’t you? That is the magic of friendship in your marriage.

In my post today, we will be looking at different ways you can develop a deep friendship with your better half and why this topic has always been kept secret to a satisfying marriage. If this is what you crave to learn, then grab a cup of coffee and let’s get started right away. Let’s learn what friendship in marriage is, its importance, and how you can build it.

Friendship in marriage improves your relationship, as your better half becomes your biggest fan, confidant, and cheerleader. This is more than just a romance; it creates the deepest connection within you, which is supported by trust, experiences, and laughter.

John and Julie Gottman, in their research work, present friendship as a foundation on which marital success is based. They discovered that those whose relationships had a strong friendship element were impossibly happier and more capable of withstanding the conflicts that would arise inevitably, and 70 percent of those marriages were successful.

Having a friendship has fostered a sense of free and open communication, along with an emotional support base, and one begins to fundamentally understand another human being. That deep connection enhances a life of joy, nullifies life’s difficulties, and forms a bond of not only love but deep satisfaction as well. It is the cultivation of this type of friendship in a marriage that leads to an exciting and long-standing partnership.

Benefits of Friendship in Marriage:

1. There is mutual support:

One of the benefits of friendship in marriage is that the couples are so free with each other. That provides a great opportunity for them to reflect on everything, including their joy, pain, frustration, and all their emotions. This, in turn, makes them know where and when support is needed.

They get maximum support from each other. It is not as though there are no fights or quarrels, but friends always know how to get over their issues and move on. That leads us to the second benefit of having your spouse as your friend.

2. Easier to Resolve Their Conflicts:

Like I said above, being a friend to your spouse allows both of you to resolve your conflicts easily and efficiently. Friendship in marriage helps you manage your disagreements with empathy and active communication skills.

By being friends, it will be easy for you to manage your conflict by understanding your partner’s perspective and coming to terms with each other. Friends will never allow arguments to last; they will always address them promptly and ensure they never sleep bearing grudges and resentment for each other.

It is the friendship foundation that creates that supportive atmosphere that enables both of you to feel understood and valued. This also makes your relationship stronger. As you keep nurturing your marriage with regular check-ins and maintenance, you will create a harmonious marriage that withstands challenges.

3. Engenders security and trust:

Of course, security and trust are the bedrock of every successful relationship. Being a friend in your marriage brings security and trust. This is because when you are friends, you know how good it is to support each other as you share good understanding and mutual support.

The understanding and support create a good environment for both of you to feel valued and secure. Friendship provides the atmosphere for you to have good communication, deal with your issues amicably, and build trust that will keep protecting your marriage.

4. Always spend quality time:

One of the characteristics of friendship in marriage is that couples enjoy being together. This is because they are not afraid and will never have enough of each other. Couples who are not friends may not be comfortable staying with each other for a long time. Friends always have some stories to tell each other, and so they always find a way to be together.

If you haven’t tried that today,. Start caring for each other and go out to those special places you will enjoy. Just do everything to be friends with each other and watch what happens to your relationship.

5. There Is Security and Trust:

relationship that consists of two friends is always calm and successful because partners trust and feel secure with each other. Remember that both trust and feeling secure are the greatest tool for a successful marriage.  Having trust for a partner doesn’t start immediately; it starts from those little romantic gestures you unknowingly make in your marriage, like gifting, validation, etc.

Feeling secure is also a result of trust.  You have stayed together for a while and you know that your partner wants you joy and happiness. With the trust that has built over time, a  sacred environment is built. There will be openness and mutual respect, too.

6. Your Love Is sustained.

Another strong benefit of friendship in marriage is the the ability to sustain the love between you and your partner. Many things will challenge your love for each other. If you are not careful, you may be swept out of love. However, couples who are friends don’t feel the same.

They see their challenges as part of learn, so they forget whatever challenges they have and move on. They never sleep with their grudges, as they know the effect it will have in their marriage. Their understanding and companionship is what sustains the marriage and help them connect effectively.

7. Good Communication:

Communication is the cornerstone of any relationship. That’s why every couple must know how to communicate effectively in their relationship. Good communication gives couples the opportunities to talk about their fears, joy and frustration, which makes the solution easier too.

Couple in friendship relationship know the importance of communication, so they are always open and honest in their communication, which helps in faster conflict resolution. Communication also helps couple know how to trust and make each other happy. When there is joy in a relationship, the relationship will grow stronger and more resilient.

9 Ways to Make Your Partner Your Best Friend:

Find  the time to do that.

Kudos to you for choosing to make your partner your best friend. It doesn’t stop with a wish; you have to make time for it. You must be intentional about that and know that it is not a month-long task. Yes, it takes time to do that.  Start with spending quality time with your partner. 15 minutes a day can be that significant to achieving your goal.

Think about your outside friendships too; you spent time with them to make the relationship last. It’s the same with your marriage. Spending quality time together is an opportunity for you to get to know each other well. According to John Guttman, knowing your partner well helps your relationship grow.

This can only be possible when you spend more time together to learn from each other. So, as you begin this journey to make your marriage the best in town,. Create that time. Later in this book, you will learn how to balance work and home life effectively.

Effective Communication:

Be ready to have transparent and open communication even when your partner isn’t. Don’t forget that I said you must be intentional to achieve your goals. Communication is not commanding your partner or giving orders. Effective communication is when you know how to pour yourself out to your partner during your conversation.

Be transparent as you say anything, because that will help to improve your trust for each other. Trust will give room for fears, fostering sharing time with each other. Make your partner know that they can depend on you. When your partner finds out that you are not feigning your actions, they will reciprocate with trust, and your relationship will feel the impact of this little attitude.

Build and support each other:

Friends support each other; therefore, take this moment to find ways to build and support each other. Don’t be jealous of each other. Many couples feel jealous when their partners are prospering more than they are. It is not supposed to be so. God brought you together to live as one, to help and support each other.

This is not about just giving them money, so don’t tell me that you don’t have the money. Mere advice can be of great help; use encouraging words to build them out when they are low in spirit. Learn not to shun or interrupt them when they are talking; you can see other opportunities to correct them after that. Also, drop whatever will cause distractions during your conversation.

Don’t Neglect Those Little Gestures:

As I said earlier, building friendship in your relationship is not about how much you are willing to spend, though it is part of it. What matters most are those little things you do on a daily basis, like keeping your appointments and fixing the toilet tap when you say you will.

True friends remember their friends birthdays and celebrate them, your marriage anniversary. Most of all, don’t forget to appreciate those little gifts they give or the compliments they give. Making your partner your friend is all about giving and receiving, so give your best and get them back.

5. Shared Interests:

This is another important way to make your partner your best friend. Shared interest is all about finding what interests both of you. This can be seen as a bridge between two friends. It is true that you have different hobbies and goals; being friends means finding common goals and hobbies for you and doing them together.

The common goals create opportunities for you to spend time with each other. The result of a study published in The Journal of Happiness states that couples are happier when they share things in common. It pays to share interests with your loved ones, so go ahead and start that.

6. Connect With Each Other Anytime and Anywhere:

Remember when you were new in your marriage? You called every time to inquire about their well-being. You want to see each other every time. If that has died in your relationship, then this is the best time to get it back.

Connect with each other every time; nothing can stop you now; you can call, chat, and send messages. Find a way to express your love for them. Make yourself available when they need a shoulder to lean on. That will restore their confidence in and trust in you.

7. Don’t Suffocate Each Other:

I said earlier that spending time with each other helps you become friends; that is true. However, spending time apart from each other helps as well. By giving space to each other, you will have opportunities to think about yourself and do things you like on your own.

Your partner also needs times to be alone, so don’t suffocate each other by being around 24/7. That little time you give is enough to renew your marriage. It is important that you find a way to create a balance between spending time together and time apart. This will go a long way toward adding more value to your marriage.

8. Learn to Forgive:

You can’t succeed in making your partner your best friend if you find it hard to forgive and let go. This is because fighting and disagreement are part of every relationship. Experts say that fighting is right; what matters is not how many times you fight, but how you fight. To succeed in your plans, fight, but don’t let that last a minute.

Don’t go to sleep with grudges from your partner’s wrongdoing. We will look at how to fight fair later in this book. Our concern now is to let you know that forgiveness matters most when you want to build friendship in your marriage. No matter how hard it is for you to forgive, then forgive, and your marriage will remain firm.

9. See a counselor:

Another option to make your spouse your best friend is to visit a marriage therapist for advice. These people are loaded with tools that will help you improve your communication skills and make your marriage better. Yes, they are human beings as well, but they are trained to help couples in times of trouble. Their advice and guidance can help you know what to do at a given point in time.

So, if you have tried all the other 8 points I have shared with you and things didn’t get better, let that be your next step. I have an article on how to locate the best marriage therapist and that will be of immense help to you. Let me know where you need my help after reading the post.


Experts have said the importance of friendship in marriage and how it will help your marriage survive. In this post, I have given you practical steps to take to do that.

So, whether you are entering a new relationship or you have been married for donkey years, this post will help you. Make sure you read this post carefully to learn the proper  ways of nurturing friendship in marriage and how to make your partner your best friend.

Aik: AIK UCHEGBU is a writer and an authority in anything that matters about marriage and how to build it successfully. His followers have been greatly enhanced by his findings. You will not be disappointed by coming to this site.