A lot has been covered in happymarriagebuilder about how to ignite your marriage afresh and so may has also been revealed here about how to be the best you can in your relationship in other to make it successful.
In this post we are going to be looking at another important ingredient you need to make right, if you desire to succeed as couples
You cannot talk about a successful marriage without talking about trust.
Trust is the backbone of all the successful marriages and that mean if your marriage is not thriving perfectly, then trust may be lacking.
Now am not saying that you have cheated on your spouse.
Many people only think about sexual unfaithfulness whenever they hear trust.
well you are not mistaken to think that.
However, there is so much more than that.
Lies and broken promises effects our marriage negatively just like infidelity. They invade our marriage and destroy the trust that exists between couples and make both feel insecure.
That means you should avoid anything that can bring insecurities between two of you at initial stage.
Because it takes so many efforts and time before trust can be rebuilt.
If trust has vanished in your relationship and you are looking to get it back, then here are few suggestions on how you can rebuild, restore build trust back in your marriage.
How to build, restore and rebuild trust in your marriage
1) Understand what killed the trust:- Whether it’s lie, infidelity, fail or broken promises that cause the breach of trust, you have to identify it and then work to restore it.
An adage say” You must know where the rain started beaten you, before you know where it stopped beating you”.
The fact is that until you know what made your partner lose confidence in you, you will not make amend.
If you said so many lies in the beginning, then you have to start being honest from now.
Start from being truthful to yourself. You can’t succeed being honest to others when you are not honest to yourself.
And if you always try to be what or who you are not, then stop it, because those are the things that can make you lie.
2) Be responsible for your actions:- Nobody is perfect, everyone can make mistakes. It is imperative to take responsibility for all your actions, your thoughts and your feelings whether intentional good or deliberate.
If you take responsibility of your actions, then it will be easier for you to make amends.
Don’t try to give excuses or try to give justifiable reason for your deeps, it may cause more harm that good.
3) Apologize:- When you are sure of the reasons for the break of trust, and you have accepted the responsibility, then next line of action is to apologize for your wrongs.
Apologize with every sincerity knowing that the way you do it will determine if you should be forgiven or not.
The way to go is to just to avoid trying to justify your actions.
Go straight to the point and show how sorry you are and promise to be good from that moment.
4) Be transparent with your mails, your gadget and social media dealings:- Don’t hide anything about your email, and text messages.
Make it open and let him/ her have the password to all your gadgets.
Be open when you answer your phone calls also.
If your spouse see that you have no skeleton in your cupboard, then trust will start coming back.
5) Start keeping promises :- Failed promises deplete trust the same way infidelity does.
If you have made so many promises in the past and didn’t fulfill it, it is time to make amends.
Promise what you have intentions of keeping.
6) Be Humble:- One great enemy of trust is pride.
You should be willing to keep your ego off and do all the needful.
If you are expected to go on your needs for things to work, then do it.
Do everything possible to fill the brokenness.
7) Keep your words from this moment:– You have apologized and your partner accepted your apology.
It is therefore important that you back your words with actions, having in mind that action speaks better than words.
Your partner will be on the look out to see that you are keeping your promises.
You have to stay dependable for a long time.
Let everything be conspicuous in your spouse’s eyes that you are seriously striving to be the best you can.
8) Be patient:- It doesn’t take to break trust in a relationship, but it takes much time to build, restore and rebuild it.
If you have started the journey to reignite trust, then you should be ready to wait.
Never give up when you see no change or little changes happening.
If you remain unmoved and consistent with your actions, then in less time you will see everything working again.
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