8 Most Common Mistakes Newlyweds Make to Avoid Now

Every couple enters their marriage with the expectations of a lifetime of joy and happiness, but the result is often different. One of the common mistakes newlyweds make is that they believe that love alone can sustain their relationship.

That’s the biggest unrealistic expectation.
According to studies, earlier marriage struggles can harm a relationship and lead to a decline in marital satisfaction within the first five years. Let’s use Sarah and James as an example. This, too, had the best wedding in town, and they assumed the love they had for each other would keep them connected ever after.

Things took a negative twist after some years: unmet expectations and financial stress crept in, and they started straining their bond. Like many other newlyweds, Sarah and James didn’t understand that avoiding the mistakes newlyweds make requires communication effort and a good mindset.

I am here to help you achieve that, so if you want to build a successful marriage, this post will take you by hand and show you the way, by exposing the most common pitfalls you must avoid.

Let’s get started.

Common Mistakes Newlyweds Make In Marriage And How To Avoid Them:

1) Not Thinking Beyond The Wedding:

One of the mistakes newlyweds make is that they forget life after their wedding. Many couples are so busy planning the wedding that they utterly forget that there’s another life after the wedding.

If only they understood that the party will only last for one day and that no matter how interesting and fun it will be, it will surely end, and a new life will begin from there.

Now it is time to live together; it is time to get along as husband and wife, and it is time to build your own family.
That’s right. Enjoy your wedding, make it a grand event, but always have the big picture in your mind. Because it is your life as a couple.

2) You Assumed Marriage Is Always Fair, Just And Beautiful:

Another common mistake newlyweds make is thinking that love alone can make a marriage successful. That’s not true. Marriage comes with ups and downs just like every other thing.
If you are going into marriage thinking everything will always be juicy, then you will be very disappointed in the time to come.

Even the so-called happy marriage has its setbacks, too. It is not rocket science to have a happy marriage. If only you will learn to do the little things that matter daily, then you will succeed.

I have written a book that will show you little things you can do to succeed in any marriage.

3) The Common Mistakes newlyweds Make Is Keeping Secrets From Each Other:

In the early stages of marriage, you were open with each other; you could share any secret, and you were comfortable divulging anything. Then something happened, and unknowingly, you started keeping little secrets from each other. Keeping secrets will always come back to bite your relationship.

Be sure to be open to each other and share your feelings, your successes, your failures, your joy, as well as your anger. You will somewhat discover that the more open your communication is, the stronger your marriage will be.

4) Acting Like You Are Still Single:

Being single and being married are two different lives altogether. Marriage is all about growing up and embracing new responsibilities and not just a new social status. When you were single, you had the freedom to hang out with your friends any time you wanted, visit clubs, and spend as much money as you wanted without looking back.

However, marriage requires a change of lifestyle. There is a need to balance your time, your financial decisions, and the nature of your relationship.

One of the common mistakes newlyweds make is not thinking of how to adjust to this latest reality. They neglect to spend quality time with each other and never quit their old habits then creating tension in their marriage. To grow in your marriage, you must embrace change, set priorities, and plan to build your future together as a team.

5) Mistake Newlyweds Make: Neglecting Quality Time in Marriage:

Marriage is very delicate and needs special care from both couples. It thrives when u nurture it with love, care, and devoted attention. One common mistake most newlyweds make is that they don’t prioritize quality time with each other. Just as fish cannot live without water, marriages stop working when partners stop nurturing them.

Indeed, work, responsibilities, and routines are always yawning to steal those precious moments for bonding, but you don’t have to give that chance. You must be conscious of managing your schedules and creating time to connect, communicate, and grow together.

Without these efforts, it may result in emotional distance and then lead to continuous misunderstanding. Truly everything to avoid these mistakes so your marriage can thrive effectively.

6) Comparing yourselves with the other couples;-

All fingers are not equal, and two people are not created the same way. The other couple is indeed living in their house, while you are in a rented apartment.
They travel often to the Bahamas during holidays, while you are not.

Hear this;

If you concentrate on counting what the other couples have and what you don’t have, then comparison starts and that is one thing that causes chaos in a relationship. You will be so distracted from keeping up with your marriage and you will lose your track. Just go on and enjoy what they have, but never be envious of them.

7) Goals Overloaded:

It is good to set goals in your marriage and for your marriage, but more important to set realistic expectations. The mistake newlyweds make is that they overload themselves with too many or more complex goals. While it is good to be ambitious, unrealistic expectations can cause serious frustration and disappointments for you and your relationship.

My advice for the Newlyweds is to always focus on simple and attainable goals instead of rigid ones. For example, concentrate on establishing your financial habits, open communication, and having regular date nights; they will improve your connection greatly. Remember that marriage is a journey and not a race, therefore, take it one step after another.

8) Spending more than earned:-

You can’t talk about the common mistakes newlyweds make and forget their spending habits. They always spend more than they earn, maybe because they have yet to understand what marriage is all about. I must let you know that the financial habits you had while single may not be appropriate now you are married.

This is because now, you are no longer single, and joint responsibilities require carefulness; when you fail to budget as a couple, you could have more stress, debt, and financial strain. To overcome this, create a realistic family budget that will balance with your income and expenses.

Take more time to track your spending, prioritize the most important things, and set a realistic financial goal as a team. However, ensure that your expenses are not higher than your income to prevent unnecessary financial issues.
Here are three more common mistakes newlyweds make:

9) Not Discussing Expectations Early Enough:

One of the biggest mistakes newlyweds make in their early days of marriage is that they don’t discuss their expectations for their marriage early enough. It is always expected that every new couple must have open communication about their finances, their roles in the marriage, boundaries, and what they expect from each other emotionally.

The truth is that when these expectations are not clearly discussed and on time, too, it can result in frustrations and resentment. To overcome this challenge, there is a need to regularly have conversations to share your hopes, fears, and needs for the future.

10) Not Seeking Help When Needed:

Everyone is guilty of this mistake, not only the newlyweds, but I added it here as the mistakes newlyweds make so you can learn from it too. Don’t assume you can handle everything on your own, whether it adjusting to married life or tackling your conflicts.

Seeking help is not just for those who are already having challenges in their relationship; you can also do so when you want to get your relationship foundation straight from the beginning. Seeking help from a qualified counselor or trusted mentor can help your marriage greatly.

Never be afraid to reach out when you feel overwhelmed in any way. People who seek guidance from experts or mentors are always on their way to building a solid foundation for their relationship.

11) Taking Each Other for Granted:

Whether you like it or not, a time will come in your relationship when you’ll start taking each other for granted. Over time, the glorious excitement of marriage wears off, and you may sometimes stop appreciating each other.

My advice to you is that you don’t let this die down. Small romantic gestures like sending love texts, a hug, and just saying thank you are enough to keep your bond stronger. Therefore, be sure to show your partner how much you care every moment, no matter how busy you are. This will surely help you prevent emotional burnout and distance from growing.

Conclusion On Mistakes Newlyweds Make in Their Marriage

Do everything you can to make your relationship better. Never hide anything from your partner. Avoid these common mistakes newlyweds make that I have mentioned in this post and watch how your marriage will thrive.

I am still your In-house counselor Murphyaik.

See you at Marriage