6 Interesting ways of setting healthy boundaries for your marriage.
1) Consider the effects of boundaries:-
Boundaries are powerful and help a relationship succeed, however, some boundaries can bring se, various pains, anger, and discomfort to your partner.
Pains and discomforts are the major causes of hatred, frustration, and resentment in any relationship.
Those are not the reasons you are setting the boundaries in the first place.
Check the consequences of your actions
However, if you want to set healthy boundaries for your marriage, you should be able to evaluate the effects of your actions.
You also should be able to know the difference between causing pain and causing injuries in all. as it will also help you in getting good results from setting boundaries.
2) Be conscious of your feelings:-
Evaluate your feeling once again to discover what actually has been effecting the ways you feel.
Does your partner’s way of talking or doing things affect you in a special way? Maybe you feel intensely bad or drained when your partner talks.
Understanding these is an important aspect of setting boundaries, as it clearly shows you have finally separated yourself from our partners feeling and actions,
Don’t be engulfed with the feelings
The most important setback we get when we set a boundary is that we are sometimes so engulfed with the other person’s feelings that we forget our own feelings.
Townsend said in his book said that your ability to understand that your partner is not an extension of you is a great way to create great boundaries.
When you are done differentiating yourself from your partner’s feelings, then you have achieved one aspect of setting a healthy boundary.
3) Never set boundary with enviousness:-
One of the challenges in marriage is envy. It can destroy any relationship.
And so it becomes extremely a war when boundaries are set with envy and strife because it will make you concentrate more on your partner’s feelings and not considering your feelings and choice.
The envious spouse always feels unimportant, which makes him or she quit developing or improving the qualities of his or her gifts, limit,s, and abilities.
When you set a boundary with enviousness, it will bring a serious fight in your relationship.
4) Show respect to your partner as you set a boundary:-
Sometimes, we tend to set our boundaries not because we want to get things better, but because we want to deal with our partner.
In setting good boundaries, we must know the difference between selfishness and setting a boundary.
Settings boundary because you are overtly angry or mere selfishness will cause more trouble in your relationship and so show some respects and carry your partner alone.
6) Communicate your boundary to your spouse:-
Tell your partner about your boundaries, and do not think he/she will accept it.
There must be some resistance from him/ her.
Try and explain it in detail and make him/ her understand fully why and what your boundaries stand for.
Understand that setting boundaries help to define who we are and what we stand for. It also shows where you end and where your partner begins.
Having boundaries will help your marriage to succeed.