If you really want a successful marriage, then looking at these 17 happy couples habits I listed in this article could be all you needed to achieve that.
One thing about marriage YOU must understand is that if you don’t take daily steps to make it works, you will suddenly see it crumbling.
That is why it is imperative that as you are studying about the thing you will do to make your friendship better, you must also look at your marriage, and think of the things or habits you will adopt, or remove to make it much better.
In this article, you will clearly see some tested and approved happy couples habits you will adopt in your marriage too.
But who exactly is this happy couple? Are there couples that are created to be happier than the other? And why must you copy other people to make your own marriage strong?
The fact still remains that; no marriage is created to be happier, stronger or even perfect. However, there is always the couple that looks as if they have it all. This couple still looks at each other and feel those sparks.
They feel happy together: the only things that matter to them are just the two of them.
It didn’t just start; overtime in their marriage, they have developed some habits, and those habits are the things that differentiated them from the other couples.
Today we are going to look at those habits and how you should inculcate them into your own marriage to make the difference too.
17 happy couples habit every partner must adopt.
(1) They know communication to be the key:
Communication has the power to build or destroy a marriage and the happy couples know this.
They also know communication to be a hard but essential recipe for a successful marriage, and they chose to do everything to build it.
In marriage, the couples that understand how to communicate openly and freely are the ones that have a fulfilled relationship. On the other, if you and your partner do not have effective communication; you are likely to have frustrations and resentments.
One important aspect of a successful marriage is communication and not just that, but effective communication.
With that, you could bring great joy to your spouse’s heart and also build your relationship to the height that you can’t imagine.
To communicate effectively with your spouse, you must know
- Those communication behaviors that add values to your marriage.
- Identify those communication behaviors that can improve and yield happiness in your relationship.
- Identify the communication behaviors that bring obstacles instead of building your marriage
- Implement communication techniques and tools that will enhance your marriage.
- Improve your ability to understand and manage every massage.
I have covered everything you need to know about communication in marriage here. So you can read that up.
(2) Happy couples know that as human beings, mistakes and arguments are inevitable:
Nobody is perfect. In fact, no marriage is 100% perfect. It takes courage and the ability to move on in the marriage. The happy couple knows these too well and they also understand the difference between having an argument as well as having a fight.
Arguments are essential for the growth of marriage; what makes the difference between the happy couple and the unhappy when it comes to argument is just the method of dealing with their conflicts.
Happy couples understand that talking and settling their disputes is better that blaming anyone about it.
Gottman, a famous marriage therapist identifies four things to be the main cause of couples’ disconnection, isolation, and being distant from each other; and criticism was the first in the list.
Think about the level of communication in your marriage; if it is not good enough, then you must try and work on it.
(3) They understand that happy relationships take work:
A perfect marriage isn’t all that sunshine and rosy all the time. It takes proper work to make a relationship worthwhile. Happy couples understand that sometimes, they could be annoyed, disappoint and frustrate with each other.
No one is above mistakes and remember that your partner is just a human being. It is left for you to get past those things, and communicate honestly with your spouse, that is the only way you can get a fulfilling marriage.
The happy couples passed through these trying times, but they inspire each other and work themselves through those trial moments.
Just devote yourselves to nurturing your own marriage. It may take a little time, but it will surely pay off in the end.
(4) Supporting each other:-
Another happy couple’s habit that is worth emulating is their ability to support each other. They understand that come what may that their spouse is there for them.
At times when it looks as if you are a crossroad, they never leave each other to face the music alone, the other partner remains them behind the other sharing up and encouraging the other.
Nothing will give your spouse courage than realizing that you are fully at the back and sharing him or her up.
If you have not been supportive of your spouse, today is the day to start. I will do wonders for your marriage.
This differentiates them from the other couples who will desert the other when things get hard.
(5) They know each other pretty well:
The happy couple knows each other very well that they would tell what each of them could be doing at a point in time even when they are not close to each other.
There is this couple I know that will be doing things simultaneously when they are not closer.
If the husband is somewhere eating big mac in MacDonald, the wife must be somewhere eating the same thing at the same time.
These couples have known each other that they know what each of them could be at a moment. Isn’t that wonderful? Won’t you want your marriage to work like that?
(6) They share realistic expectations
The relationship is very much different from what you see in a movie. It can only happen when people have value for each other, and both of them are willing to make some sacrifices in other to make their marriage worthwhile.
They devote much time to their relationship because they know that every day will not be for joy and romance.
(7) They understand that each relationship is unique:
Because happy couples understand that each marriage is unique, they never try to compare their marriage with other people. Every partner has their personal habit, “love rule” as well as arguments.
If you will be smart enough to discover what makes you and your spouse unique, and then concentrate on doing it. That is when your marriage will stand firm.
(8) They love and respect each other:
Another unique happy couple’s habit that is worth copying is their ability to show great love and respect for each other.
In the Bible, it was recorded that even at the age of 80, Sarah still calls Abram my Lord. That is a sure sign of respect.
It is important you love and respect your spouse so that your spouse will love you in return; because love and respect are reciprocal.
(9) They know each other love language:
The way your mum cheered up when you did anything, may not be the way your spouse will react when you do the same thing. We have different love and values.
Most time the things that make each couple feel loved varies and if partners didn’t recognize them on time, it may be causing troubles.
If you are not sure of your partners to love language, it may be better if you ask. You may not be vigilant enough when your partner was letting you know them, now it is your work to find it out.
Just go ahead and ask about the things you did that have triggered love, he or she will be very eager to tell you.
Everyone wants to be treated with love.
(10) They reassure each other:
Everybody needs to be reassured from time to time. Give it always and never wait for the other to need before giving.
Always let him or her know how you feel about having him/her.
Let your other half feel safe and relaxed and secure in your relationship. Let ‘ I love you” be a poem in your mouth.
Nothing will make your spouse feel secure than hearing those words. So let it pop up every minute even without planning it.
It is one of the secrets of those happy couples you see.
(11) They hug and kiss each other at least 30 seconds every day:
Yes, I prescribe 30 seconds because I know it is enough to push out the cuddle hormone called oxytocin which is responsible for those feeling that is relevant for the success of your marriage.
So in the morning, before you go out to give the 30-second hug, and when you come back again in the evening. Let it not be less than 30 seconds and not more than that.
When you continue it that way, you will find out that you can quickly get in the mood without planning it.
However, since this prescription works like magic, it will not be good if you stop doing it for some time. Your partner may feel that you don’t care anymore.
(12) They know how to deal with their conflicts:
The difference between the happy couples and the non-happy couple is the way they deal with their conflicts.
It inevitable to disagree in a relationship, but it is also good when you disagree skillfully.
One technique the happy couples adopts during their disagreement is the choice of word, they use more “plural pronouns” like (us, ours, we) instead of the “singular pronoun” like (me, I, and mine) and this to not to feel stressed after the whole argument.
It is essential not to shout, yell or use those hurtful words that cannot be easily taken back during those heated moments.
Remember, actions can easily be forgotten, but words are there forever. Never be obstinate, it may be just nice if you compromise in certain things. Remember you want to make your marriage work.
(13) They live with full integrity:
They trust each other so much and know their spouse will not take them for granted because of that. It is impertinent to live daily with fairness reliability and integrity.
(14) Happy couples have a positive mentality regarding each other:
Research by a marriage researcher Gottman Ph.D. proved that happy couples marriage are usually characterized by some emotional traits like affection, respect, and empathy, and they are usually mindful of each others feeling.
They see their challenging moments as another opportunity to grow their marriage. And that each of them is responsible for their growth.
This is what makes them different for those guys who have separated or that are still in the process of separation.
That divorced couple never has any positive remark or feelings as regards to their marriage.
(15) They are committed to their marriage:
For a marriage to thrive well, the two people involved have to be committed to making it so. The happy couples understood this very well, that is why they do everything to make their marriage stand out.
-They commit their time.
-They commit their money
– They commit their health also, just because it matters to them.
(16) They spend quality time with each other:
Spending quality time together is one of the habits of a happy couple that gives them an edge over every circumstance that will come in the future.
These are moments they devote to discussing the thing that matters to their marriage. They take time to share their pains, their joy, their mistakes, and their weaknesses.
To build a bond in marriage takes time and effort, it starts from sharing quality time together. It is true we are very busy people that at times 24 hours becomes small for us to achieve all we want; still you it is possible to find some moments to connect with your partner.
Remember it does not matter the amount of time you spent with your spouse. What matters is the quality of time.
17 They never have a secret: It is not proper to keep secrets.
Remember it was easy for you while you were still single; now you are married; it is not business as usual. Every secret kept will someday be known and your partner may not be happy to know you kept such a secret for a long time.
Keeping secrets will make you lie and lie can destroy your marriage. So be open and have no secret.
These are exactly some of the happy couple’s habits that make them different from the other couples. You cannot necessarily use all of it, but you can select the ones that can work well in your marriage and start today to apply it.
The results may not be seen immediately, but you will surely see changes in record times.