Love is certainly a wonderful thing, but having your marriage work is another matter. This is because while love is the foundation of a successful marriage, your relationship can be battered down by a number of issues. However, if you know the ways to make your marriage work, then you are good to go.
Certainly love is not enough
The truth is that love alone is not enough to make your marriage work, because love in and of itself provides no structure, no training for how to work with your partner in the day to day relationship.
Successful marriages are based on listening to your spouse, trusting them to do what is right, and keeping the proper perspective that makes a marriage work.
If you will learn and inculcate all the above-mentioned facts in your own relationship, then it must surely work perfectly.
If you are still lost in the sea about how to make your marriage work again, don’t worry, because, in this post, you will learn the exact steps I use to keep my marriage working.
Here are they
11 Secrets To Make Your Marriage Work Again:
1) Mind Your Manners
It’s funny how we often we respect stranger more than we do to our spouse. As parents, we demand that our children learn proper manners, but we also have not learned it too, that’s why we have problems with our spouses.
Respect your partner the way you will want them to respect you.
To be respectful to each other starts with the little things such as saying please when asking for the salt rather than just demanding the salt.
In every marriage, there are going to be issues that will arise which may require serious discussion. Such discussions should not take place if you are tired or hungry. Set aside a time where you can discuss such matters, especially when both of you are ready.
2) Keep Money in its Place
The subject of money has been and always will be the single greatest form of stress on a marriage.
Sometimes, not having enough money to do what is needed puts an untold hardship on your marriage, so it is vitally important that such stresses be kept in their proper perspective.
You really have to keep money in their place. Am not asking that you go overboard because of money. But you should learn how to save for the future, and how to minimize your spending.
Many happy couples who have overcome tremendous financial hardship and so can you and your spouse.
Just take time to learn what you should do to avoid money problems ruining your relationship.
3) Treat Your Spouse like the Honored Guest in the House
Similar to mind your manners, treating your spouse like the most honored guest means that you listen to what they have to say and show a little deference before acting upon your emotions.
Naturally, this only works if both of you are on the same page, but it’s amazing just how many potential problems or misunderstandings can be avoided when treating your spouse as an honored guest.
How do you treat your partner like an honored guest?
– Keep them happy always.
– Meet their needs.
– Be their best friend.
– get gifts for them.
– Be there for them when you are needed.
4) Make a Date Night
Create a night once a month where you can spend a few hours with each other and without the children present.
You don’t have to go out to a costly restaurant or five-star hotel. Just find a suitable place and spend some time with each other, enjoying your favorite activities, such as playing games with your friends.
If you are taking care of an infant, then it’s okay to bring them along. Remember however that this is a night for both of you to enjoy as adults.
5) Always Let Your Spouse Know That You Are Blessed To Have Him / Her:
Well, this should be a must-do for you. You married your partner after you have met many people and so it should be a privilege you are married to each other.
Try and let them know how great you feel to be married to him or her.
Your spouse needs to be assured of this fact, don’t assume they know because they are not readers. Let it come straight from your mouth.
Just appreciate each other, help in some domestic chores, and do whatever that will prove your love to your mate.
6) Tackle Disagreements With Maturity:
Whether you like it or not, there must be some disagreement and sometimes fight. It is normal. Don’t run away from them nor avoid it: it will help your marriage become stronger.
You only need to handle them with maturity so your relationship won’t be affected.
Always hear your spouse’s point of view and don’t let your anger cause serious problems. Find a good time to talk about the issues and not when everyone is tensed.
7) Think Of What Made You fight:
You can’t make your relationship work if you are not careful to know what usually causes problems for you.
What really happened, did any of you cheated, consider who cause the issues, think about your own contribution to the problems at hand. These will help you to know what to avoid or concentrate on making your relationship work again
8) Relate With Each Other’s Families.
Your partner will be happy to know that you are on good terms with his or her family. Call them and ask how they are doing, be their friend.
I know it will not be easy for you to do if they gave you hard times earlier, maybe you hate them now because of that, but don’t count it on them.
Try as much as you can to show them, love, it will make your partner happy and he/ she will love your family back.
Here are a few ways to relate with your inlaw.
- Treat them as your family member: The moment you start seeing your inlaws as your own blood, the better you want to treat them as you would your family too. Remember that marriage has brought all of you together, so make an effort to love and treat them well.
- Don’t see them as your enemy: One day you will be a mother in law or a father-in-law and you will expect to be treated well by your children’s spouses. Start treating your mother in law well, so you’ll when your time comes.
- Don’t compete with any of them: Know your stands as the husband or wife. Just get it in your head that you are only a wife or husband and not the parents and they can’t replace you either. In order words, don’t try to be what you can’t to your partner.
- Don’t try to separate them from their siblings: Do not think of antagonizing your mate with their siblings, it took them many years to build that relationship you want to destroy in 2 years and you may fail if you try to do that.
9) Be Ready To Give Your Best To Make Things Work:
No one from the outside can make your marriage work than you and your partner. In fact, involving anyone else in any matter concerning your relationship can be a suicide mission, because every couple has one problem or the other.
The best you can do when you are looking for things to do to make your marriage work is to determine the part you must play to make things work.
What would you add or remove? Decide and start putting your best immediately. Don’t wait until things get worse, it may not be easy at that point.
10) Have Boundaries:
Set boundaries from the beginning of your relationship and let each other know what you can or can not do.
Your boundaries are those things that show you where your power ends and where your spouse’s power begins. It is never a right to rule over your mate.
Having your boundaries will help you know when your partner or someone else is overstepping your boundary.
Therefore, set your boundaries and describe to your partner the importance so they don’t feel betrayed.
11) Don’t Breach The Trust:
It is always easy to destroy trust in a relationship than building or rebuilding one. This is why you should be careful about what you do or not do.
There are many trust killers which you must avoid: like telling lies, cheating, being judgemental, coming home late.
If you can avoid those things I mentioned above and more, then you are serious about making your marriage work.
No matter how bad your relationship has become, it is possible to make it work again. If it is possible to make your marriage work after cheating, then you can always make things better again.
I have provided you with some steps in this post. All that is left is to put them to work and watch what happens later. You will definitely have results.
The first step to a happy marriage