It is one thing to be married, and it is another thing to stay happy in marriage for the rest of your life.
Why did i say so?
There is always going to be problems and challenges in marriage. Even those you called best couples usually have their fair share of speed bumps too.
However, the difference between that happy couples and the one that ended in divorce is that while the former choose divorce as their best option in resolving the conflict in their marriage, the later considers fixing their marriage and getting it bubbling again.
Fixing a marriage still remain the best option for you; if you should look back and think about the good times you shared with your spouse in the earlier stage of your marriage.
I usually advice my clients to try and recite those marriage vows again and again, may be that will help to bring back the memories.
Bellow is the list of things you will try to inculcate in your marriage, if you want to remain happy in married for the rest of your life.
1) Think about what you want for your marriage:
If you are really serious about fixing your marriage and staying happy in your marriage, then the first thin to do is to know exactly what you want.
Get a journal, and invite any of you best friends that you can confined on or even a private counselor and try to figure out all the things you believe to be the reasons for the problems in your marriage / relationship.
When you know the real reasons for the issues in your marriage, will solve half of the Problems, because now you know where to start solving the problems.
2) Get committed in making it work: –
It is not just about writing down the things you want to achieve in your marriage, but committing yourself in working with it until you succeed in fixing your marriage.
Being committed means pledging to do, give and be your best in other to make thing better in your relationship. It means sacrificing your best for your marriage, because you believe in it.
There are times when things will look pretty bad, your ability to say ” I must make this marriage stand firm again no matter how bad”, is what I called commitment.
Go ahead and do your best for your marriage.
3) Change your attitude towards your marriage:
Re-evaluating your attitude is very important if you want to stay happily married.
You know yourself, you know your impact in your relationship. If you are affecting it positively, then go ahead, but if your attitude is causing more problems then it’s time to stop.
Try and change those attitudes you believed to be the reason for problems in your marriage.
For example, if your spending habit, drunkenness is making your partner feel bad, then it’s high time you stopped.
4) Be nice to your spouse: –
Many couple finds it hard to be nice to their spouse, instead they choose to be the best outside. Show appreciation towards each other.
This will help in fixing the holes in your marriage.
5) Do not blame each other: –
If you are experiencing challenges in your marriage, do not put the blame on your spouse, because blames has never accomplished any good thing than to make the matter at hand worst.
Even when the fault is from your partner, I still advice you not to blame him/ her because it will keep you away from regrets and causing other harm to your partner and relationship.
Often times we point fingers, not because we want to, but because we are stressed and not seeing clearly, but,you can.call yourselves to other when we realise it and stop immediately.
6) Enjoy quality times together: –
Spend more times together and enjoy every bit of your stay together. Make it a memorable one for the two of you. Forget about every other thing and put more attention to your spouse. Remember it is just the two of you together.
When you pend time together, you’ll have more opportunities to talk about so many things that matters in your relationship.
When you find and talk about what is not working or working, you will.be able to bring solutions to table and that will help your relationship grow.
7) Hold him/her to a high esteem: –
I have heard a wife telling the husband that he is only good outside and not in the home. ” if your friends ask for anything, you don’t hesitate, but when I do, it takes you time to do” A wife was crying.
I am sure you have heard such too. She means that you are not making her your priority.
Treat your spouse the way you will expect him/her to treat you back. Do not allow any other thing to take the care you are supposed to give to your spouse away.
You know you love and care for her/him, but there seen other things that’s taking her place in your mind daily.
If you want your partner happy, then make him/her the number one.
8) Say yes when what you mean is yes: –
Try to be the best you can be to your spouse. Make him/her trust you more by becoming trust worthy. Do not make the promises you will not make any plan to fulfill. It pays to make your yes be yes and your no a no.
The truth is that it is easy to break a trust, but pretty hard to regain.
If you don’t want to suffer the effect of distrust in future, start building trust than destroying it.
Finally, There are many things you can do to make your relationship the best, start doing them now, don’t wait until things get out of hand.
Remember, if your spouse is happy, then your marriage will also be happy.