What does love really means to you?
I asked this question because I know love means so many different things to different people and relationships, especially when you consider their experiences in their marriages.
The true meaning of Love will also differ, when you consider that people have different ways of giving and taking love and also depending on who defines it to you and the experiences surrounding their own love journey.
Truth is that so many people have got their fingers seriously burn when what they believed was love turns to be a nightmare to them, and if you ask these set of people, you’ll be disappointed at their own definition of love.
To the ones on a honeymoon, you could guess what definition they will give you about love.
If you have been in many relationships which you believed will last long, but didn’t happen the way you thought, if you’ve also believed you’ve found the perfect love and found yourself been deceived by who you believed was a perfect lover, and now you are asking the question about the true meaning of Love in a relationship, then this post is written with you in mind.
And after reading, you’ll understand what love is really all about, how to know when you find real love as well as how to reciprocate love.
If that’s what you want, then let’s get down to business.
1) Love is the ability to understand your partner fully:- your ability to know your partner well will distinguish your relationship from others. No other person should know and understand you better than your partner and vise versa, if it happens, then there’s a serious problem along the line, and seriously intimacy is lacking, which is a good sign of serious problems in a relationship.
A good example of a passionate relationship is that which the husband and wife has clear knowledge of each other.
In relationships, knowing your partner well means more than having good sexual relationship, but, when you understand each other so well so much so that you understand each others needs,, respects you and put your happiness above his/ her own.
The inability to know each other pretty well will only make your relationship cold, lifeless and without good values.
2) True Love has a life of its own ( it grows daily):– Lately I took a survey of my readers, and I found one thing common from the response they gave to my question about how they could describe the true meaning of Love in their marriage. They all explained they didn’t love each other much in the beginning than they do now.
It’s only at this stage of a relationship you’ll know whether the relationship will be transformed into a long lasting one or not. Fake love will definitely die a natural death, but true love stands through the thick and thin.
However, when couples continue to struggle through life challenges together, they start growing closer and fonder of. each other. The fact that you can rely on your spouse to meet your needs compels you to love and cherish him/ her.
True love is obviously a journey through hills and Valleys and nothing builds bond in a relationship like being there for each other when going through life challenges together. As couple grows together and survive trying times together.they understand what they should do to make their relationship better over time.
3) It means being excited to have your spouse as life partner:- You know how much you are in love when you feel so happy and not sad to know you’ll spend the rest of your life with him or her. It doesn’t matter if he!/she eventually becomes broke, have stroke or is permanently on a wheel chair. All you know is that you’ll love even when love seem impossible.`
4) it’s being Transparent an Open :’– Your partner expects you to be overtly open and transparent in your dealings with him or her. There’s no room for secrecy in any marriage
To put simply, marriage is expected to be most open relationship in this life, because you can never have good intimacy without openness. I bet you that if you are not the transparent authentic you to your partner, you’ll be building a strong wall between you and your partner.
Transparency is just the act of showing everything you feel, without hiding anything. Example is when you are ready to share you deepest secrets with him/ her.
Therefore be open to relate your needs to him so he could know how best to respond to solving your problems. Unmet needs are the greatest cause cause of problems in a marriage. In other words be as open as you can be to make life easy with you and your partner.
5) Love is being responsive:- Knowing how well to be responsive to your partner will take your marriage to a higher height. It will make your partner feel good and satisfied in your relationship and also ready to reciprocate the gesture.
One of the ways to be a good responsive partner is also be a good listening partner, acting fast in solving his/ her problems as well as taking care of the most important needs of your partner.
The quality of a marriage can fully be measured from the way partners understand and supports each other.
6) Accepting your spouse good and bad:- When you are able to see your partner the way they are and clearly accepting their good and bad part of lives without even wanting to change anything. Your relationship will never be successful when you always assumed that your partner needs to change.
The founder of yourtango.com and also a writer of a best selling relationship book “The Radical acceptance” Andrea Miller said that “the best ways to overcome arguments in a relationship is too stop trying to change your partner.
What he meant is that when you radically accept your spouse, tension will greatly be reduced and your partner will feel secured to get closer to you.
Everyone wants to be in a relationship that’s free of judgements and unsecured.
7) Being Respectful and kind to your partner:-Love makes us act kindly and respectfully to our spouse. We are also always mindful of how we treat them to avoid hurting them. Without been told, one can conveniently summarize our love and respect to our spouses just by hearing us talk to or about our partner. Never criticize, but show more love.
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