If your once a happy marriage starts going sour all of a sudden, don’t blame it on the witches or anybody. If you take your time to look inside, you may be convinced that the fault is all from you. It could be because of those toxic behaviors from you.
In this post I will show you what those toxic behaviors are, so you can avoid them in your relationship.
A time came in my marriage that I asked my wife to list some of my behavior that repels her, and I was shocked to see an endless list.
You can do the same too. However, if these 5 behaviors still exists in you, then don’t be surprised when you see your spouse avoiding you.
1) You are a nag:-
If you are such that likes to murmur, criticize, shout, yell, condemn etc, then you are a nagging husband / wife and your partner will never want to get close to you at any time and that brings a disconnect both physically and emotionally.
I bet this is not what you want in your Marriage.
The fact is that sometimes we don’t know we are nagging, but when you find yourself desiring people to do things the same way you want it, then you are in the game.
The truth is you are trying to make things work out the way you want it, but to the other partner, it’s a command (nagging) and no one wants to be commanded.
Most times its poor communication that leads to that, and constantly nagging your spouse means you don’t trust her /him, and you don’t think about his/her feelings too.
Here is a checklist of 6 (toxic behaviors) ways nagging destroys a relationship
- It brings quarrel:- The reason that you always want things to be done your way will always bring quarrel and that brings avoidance and a disconnect.
- Poor or no communication
- Both of you becomes enemy.
How to stop nagging :-
One way to stop nagging is to always see the good side of him/her.
My wife is not the outgoing type, wow! how I wish my marriage is as happy as Mr Williams, my husband can never help me keep the house clean like Mrs Johnson’s husband, my wife is fond of keeping her hair lose, she should learn how to pack it sideways like that woman next door.
If you find yourself talking like that, then you are full of comparison and it can hurt your spouse and kill your relationship.
From science research, comparison was found to be the source for jealousy, envy, depression and can as well destroy your ability to trust.
If comparison can breed all these, then why do you still indulge in it?
Everyone is unique and every marriage is unique too. what works for others may not work for you: Just be contented with who or what you have and move forward.
3) Coming home with your business :-
You leave early to work everyday and come back late also: so why do you still come home with your work?
It’s possible there’s need to do one or two checks on you business at home, but that should not be at the expense of the time you spend together as spouse.
Couples time is important, because that’s when you discuss about how to move family forward.
So forget about business when at home and have a nice time together if you want your marriage successful.
4) You are married to your gadgets:-
Technology has brought joy to the world, bit it has also brought division in relationships.
In almost every marriage now, you see each partner holding his/her Android phone laptop, iPad, iPod or other devices. All these though they are good, but they bring distractions to our relationships.
It hinders communication and that brings a disconnect also.
So if you have the habit of pressing you laptop, phone or iPad, you are only causing damage to your relationship. Learn to off it sometimes and pay attention to what your spouse want to say.
5) Pride and Ego:-
You are too full of yourself. No one is equal to you, both your spouse.
Frankly, Ego and pride has destroyed so many marriages, because it prevents good communication and closeness.
However, relationship thrives well where there is compromise and understanding.
Too much pride and Ego can only destroy your relationship because it will make you less compassionate and keep people away from you.
So to avoid your spouse preferring to stay alone instead of coming close to you, put off your garment of ego.
A great attitude they say is like a perfect cup of tea so if your attitude is not good enough, then you are missing that perfect coffee.
Remember toxic behaviors can hurt your relationship, but a good attitude will help to make your relationship successful.
See you at the Top.
From your friend Murphyaik.
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