Do you want to have a lasting and passionate relationship?
If you answer yes to that question, then you are in for a big threat, because in this post, I will reveal to you easy steps to create the happier relationship you’ve ever wanted; that’s a promise I’ll not fail to keep.
Research shows that over 50% of marriages / relationships are resulting to divorce monthly, simply because many couples don’t know the importance of making efforts to improve their relationship on.the daily bases.
However, if you have been wishing to improve your marriage/relationships, if you desire to have more love in your life, then get yourself a cup of tea or coffee to relax your nerves as I reveal these 4 easy Steps that will.help you create happier relationship.
If you are ready, then let’s get started.
How To Create A Happier Relationship.
Step One) Quit The Wrong Relationship Earlier::- Although this may sound terrible to hear, but truth still remains that there are some relationship that can’t be fixed no matter how hard you try, and since you are hoping to have a happy relationship, your first step should be to extricate yourself from such.
Sometimes we see ourselves in a relationship where we seem more miserable instead of being happy, the type of relationship where we know in our heart from the onset that it’s not going to work out, yet we continue to stick around hoping that one day there’ll be a change.someday.
Here’s my sincere advice; the more you waste time waiting for the wrong person change, the less time you’ll have left to find the right person – simply put, leave the wrong relationship once you realise you are not compatible.
And you must have in mind that no relationship or rather nobody is indispensable.
You will still be opportune to get into a better relationship when you give up the unproductive one.
One of the greatest problems we have is the inability to grasp when the person we trust so much stops adding values to us, but here are few signs to know when to really quit.
– When You Lose All Your Trust:– Trust is one of the ingredients of a successful relationship and so when is compromised, everything cease to be the same again.
You can take years to establish trust, but second to destroy it, therefore it is imperative you build your life around those you find trustworthy, genuine, reliable and those that are concerned about your happiness.
When you feel you can’t rely on your partner again from the beginning of your relationship, then quit.
– You Feel Sad When You See Them:– If you feel unsettled when they come around you and they no longer bring joy to you like before, then it maybe a red flag.
– Addiction:- Whether its drugs, gambling, alcoholic, addiction remains bad especially if it’s affecting your healthy. Be quick to understand when it’s not conducive for you anymore and run.
– When You Grow Apart From Each Other:- This is a normal occurrence in every relationship, however, when it happen in the beginning of the relationship, that maybe a clear sign to run.
I really know that it is not that easy to quit a relationship, but you will.feel.sorry for yourself letter if you fail to little listen to those early sign.
So here’s how to overcome it earlier.
Just reassure yourself that everything happens for a reason, period.
Step Two) Discover Your Hidden Love Languages:- It’s never possible for you and your partner to have the same love language. That’s always the main issue in any relationship.
There are 5 love languages and you. must know which explains your in other to strike balance in your relationship.
What exactly is love language and how does it effect your relationship?
Love Languages can be described as different ways couples express their love for Each other, as well as how they can nurture and heal their relationship.
Like I said earlier, there are five different love languages according to the marriage experts and I will take time to explain them one after the other.
Gary Chapman in his book called the five love languages, explained that people usually experience the love language in different ways, and that it can ultimately cause confusion an conflicts among them.
Let’s take a look at the five love, so we can understand how it helps us create a happier relationship.
– Words of affirmation:– From Chapman’s explanations, those in this type of love language want to always hear those romantic words like “I love you“, you are the best thing that happens to me, etc from their partner.
They will also feel loved when you.send romantic notes or voice messages explaining the reasons you cherished them.
Dr Tina B.Reasons, also said that saying things like “I appreciate what you did”, or thank you also make.them feel loved.
They simply want to hear it from your mouth and they’ll be happy you.said it.
– Quality Time:- To the people in this love language, nothing says it to them better like living all to give undivided attention to them.
f you can.sacrifice your time to be with them with the TV set, your phone off at those moments, you’ve made them feel extremely special and loved.
To them, any form of distractions, inability to listen can hurt them seriously. However, whether it’s engaging in an activities together, or showing undivided attention to them, you are creating a deep bond between the two of you.
– Physical Touch
Couples who speak the love language of physical touch prefers any form of physical touch, like holding hands, pat on the back, hugs to any other types of love expressions.
According to B. Tessina, physical touch remains the most direct way to express love. “ Especially when it’s done in a loving atmosphere and not oppressive”. “physical touch is preferably the most effective love languages, because It reassures, and also heals, says” Tessina.
– Acts Of Service:- So many people ask if helping out in the domestic work can also be classified as love language.
The answer is Yes!
Reason is that whatever you do to lift burden off your spouse counts as an expression of love.
Things like preparing a meal, trashing the bin, washing the dishes,changing the baby’s diaper, keeping the car clean are all the examples of acts of service.
most time they even feel loved just to hear words like “I will help you do that”.
When you create more works for them or leave him or her so all the works alone, make them feel as if their feelings are neglected.
– Receiving Gifts:- You can talk of love without mentioning “giving” as one of the bases of love.
When you look at the other four languages of love I have mentioned earlier, you’ll definitely see that all of them are pointing towards giving to your partner.
However, to some, receiving gifts means excess love to them.
When you give gifts to your partner, they feel very happy just to know you think about them, because you can’t give to someone without thinking about him/her.
The thought alone speaks volume to them talk less of the gift itself.
“Gifts are simply a heartfelt symbols to you of someone else’s love and affection for you”.
Finally, understand that everyone has a different of expressing love and so it’s imperative to be aware of the love language your partner speak, for that only will help you build a happier relationship.
Step Three) Get More Committed:- Before showing you some ways you can get committed to making your relationship succeed, let quickly see what commitments really is
What is commitment? Commitment according to Cambridge dictionary is “willingness to give your time and energy to something that you believe in or promise, or form decision to do something”.
If you relate that definition to marriage, then it will mean; willingness to give time and energy to your relationship, because you believe so much in it and want it to succeed.
Fact is that if you want to have success in your marriage, a significant level of commitment is needed.
It simply means a dedication to do whatever is required to make a relationship work and that also means that you have to sacrifice so many of your desires to have your way in many things including arguments and still be happy that it goes like that.
What a sweet world it would be if both couples and not just one will pledge complete commitment to their relationship without looking back; divorce and separation will be greatly minimized.
According to Bradbury and co, ” Any marriage in which both people are willing to make sacrifices for the same of their marriage are more likely have a happy and lasting relationship”.
Also according to sturdy conducted in 2013, also proves that ” one third of people will feel more optimistic about life if their partner shows more commitment
Here are few ways you can be committed
a) Be Open To Love:– According to George Sand, a French Novelist, the only happiness in life is to love and be loved in return. Send also says that “it’s really a blessing to to be open to love.
Question is, who.doesn’t want love?
I know you’ll answer ” nobody”, but believe me when I told you that not everyone is open to love.
Here’s why I said so;
you’ll agree with me that there are lots of people whose both non verbal messages and actions will show you their lack of interest to give or receive love and yet they claim to want love. But obviously, being open to love is simply all about what you have inside,
The fact that it’s difficult to expect love from other people when you can’t firstly love yourself.
If what I said above describes you, and you really want to put more efforts to change it, then below are things you can do to always be open to love
Here are few check lists
– Love yourself first: you can’t give or receive love if you don’t first love yourself.
– Do Things You Love So Much:- Engage in anything that gives you utmost joy.
– Give Love To Someone Else.
– Stop Judging Others.
– Let Go All Your Grudges.
b) Put Both Legs In:- There are so may things that causes stress in every relationship and no marriage is completely free from stress no matter how happy it is.
There are ways to behave when those stress comes, for example, it will be a disaster to start nursing negative thoughts instead of standing your ground to make things work again.
You maybe destroying your relationship more if you are in a relationship and you are either “fantasizing about other people outside”, having wrong or ( judging thoughts about your partner) or even keeping plans to “escape” in mind.
Those thoughts will hinder you from thinking what to do to get relationship stronger.
The best thing to do is to keep both feet in and get committed.
Don’t keep waiting or your spouse to give you reasons to put your legs in, because It may not happen that way, but when you pledge your commitment, your partner will definitely follow suit.
Step Four) Spice Things Up:-
There’s need to nurture your relationship daily, if you want it to succeed.
The same way a farmer tends to his farm to get the best harvest, every couple is expected to spice their relationship up daily else weeds will grow on it.
You may not need to work so hard to spice up your relationship when it is still new.
Research proves that from one and half to two years (1 1/2 or 2 years, couple still feel happy and loved, but after that, things starts fading away.
It doesn’t mean there’s no more love between the couples, but the relationship has entered a “new phase of relationship”.
At this stage, if you don’t do anything fast, it will keep deteriorating until things becomes irreversible.
The only way out is to keep the fire burning, by taking some actions.
I Have written extensively about how husband and wife can spice up their marriage, so I may not need to go in details here how to do it here.
You can read the Definitive Guide on How To.Spice Up Your Marriage As Couples: here.
Rounding Up:- You must do whatever is necessary to make your marriage successful.If you fail to take actions,your relationship will either die or remain unhapp forever.
But if you want to create more happier relationship,then follow the four easy step process I outlined in this post.
You’ll definitely get results.
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