Why you will get married to the wrong person

  wrong spouse, bad marriage, wrong reasons to marryIt is not a curse and it is not my wish also that you get married to the wrong person, nobody wants to get married to wrong person, in fact everybody avoid that like bomb, but if your reasons to get married and your choices are related to what I will describe in a minute, then you are planning for yourself the worse relationship ever.

 

Marrying the wrong person is what everyone hates to do, people try everything they could to avoid it, yet so many people end up falling into the arms of the wrong partner.

Here are the reasons.

              Why you will marry the wrong person

 

wrong marriage, bad spouse1 When all you want is money:- Getting married to a rich man or woman is good because you are sure that your needs will be met, but, if you make it a criteria that only a rich guy or lady will marry you, then you are making a big mistake.

 

You must also know that you’ll never be a priority to that rich husband, because his life work will definitely be there before you, unless you’ll want to be the number 3 in his list of priorities.

 

A rich guy /lady will not want to display his romantic side to you because he knew too well that he can buy his way to your heart, he can shower you with gifts, but have you thought about what he does on those long business trips?

well you want money and other women out there want the same, so don’t be jealous he throws the same money around the other women.

 

wrong choice of spouse2 You are pressured by friends and family:– It may be true that your family members or friends are pressuring you to get married, but understand that marriage is not a day job, it is a lifetime thing and so you really have to take a deep breath and think about the decision you want to take.

Never rush into marriage because anyone told you to, do what you think is right for you, ask yourself if really you are ready to take that step, if the choice you are making is the right thing for you.

Remember, when things starts crumbling down, those friends and family may not be there to comfort you .

 

3 You love him /her so much and don’t want to lose him/her: – Well, love is important in any relationship, but it is genuine when the love is balanced. Actually you love him /her so much and will not want to lose him /her that’s right, but he /she still abuses you and he /she doesn’t reciprocate your love and you believe he/she will change in future?

Dear, if one door close, another one will open. If you lose any boyfriend or girlfriend then the two of you are not meant to be together in the first place

Always be ready to let him/her go and trust God that your dream man will come.

 

wrong relationship, wrong spouse, wrong marriage4 Your clock is ticking fast: – Yes! You are 27 yrs old, next three years you ‘ll be 30 yrs and you want to get married immediately because your biological clock is ticking fast and silently reminding you that you are getting old.

 

Tell me, would it be better to be in a bad marriage than get old? Age is only a number. Your real and mister right will not want to know your age any time he comes. So all you have to do is commit it to God and let Him do the rest.

 

5 You believe you owe him /her: – It’s true he/she paid your school fees, she took care of your unpaid bills and was there for you when things were not going well.

 

Now you think it’s your turn to pay back. That maybe the worst mistake you ‘ll make in life. What if you are not compatible with each other?

It is good you marry because you want to and not because you want to pay your debt.

 

wrong choice, wrong marriage6 You as are pregnant /she is pregnant for you: – It may be that he impregnated you or you are pregnant for him, but that shouldn’t be the reason for marrying him /her

Although that may sound good, but in your marriage you’ll find out that your partner is just a baby mama /father and not your husband or wife and that’s because the child is the foundation of your marriage.

 

7 You want to get over an Ex:- You heard that your Ex. is married or getting married or your Ex. dumped you and you think the way forward is to get a long life relationship so you can easily forget your Ex. That’s a wrong reason to marry, because you may end up marrying someone you don’t love or doesn’t love you either.

 

8 He just asked you to:– It’s somehow hard to reject a marriage proposal, but that doesn’t mean you should give your hands of marriage so easily to any man.

Remember, when you give your hand your heart and your everything becomes involved also.

He may not be the right one for you, so why not take it easily?.

 

9 You want to be happy: -Getting into any relationship /marriage will never make you happy, but, your happiness can earn you a good marriage.

Get a life you want now you are single and understand that marriage is not about your happiness, but about your partner’s happiness.

Finally: – Be careful when you are making your choice of partner. It is better to be single than to be married to the wrong spouse. Pray for God’s guidance and he will direct your part to a successful relationship or marriage.

I am still your friend murphyaik. See you at the top .

Also remember to take this conversation further by sharing it with your friends on Facebook, twitter and others.

I will be back again soon.

You may also want to read

1. 10 Things to do to have a successful marriage.

2. 11 Things I wish someone told me before I got married

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Little Known Ways to Protect your Marriage

protect your marriage,take care of your spouseWe are always too careful and will go to any length to protect our costly jewelry from theft insure our other properties for safety, but sometimes it never occurs to us that our marriage needs to be protected too.

Right from the beginning of our marriage we never thought there’s any need whatsoever for protection. We believed there’s no need to build emotional fence of protection around our marriage.

That’s the reason you see marriages crashing in its earlier stage and ask the couples and they will tell you that everything was going pretty well until they found out thing were not normal again.

That’s right: )

 

Every day, our marriages pass through huddles, and while some couples overcome the challenges, others get stocked in it.

The former failed because there were no measures in place about protecting their marriage: but the later stood their ground because they have built an edge around them.

In this post, I want to show you some steps you should take to protect your marriage from the unforeseen

Let’s get down to business now.

 

How to protect your marriage

 

1 creates good boundaries: – It’s good to have healthy boundaries in your marriage as well honor the boundaries.

Boundaries simply show where your power begins, where it ends and where your spouse begins and ends too.

But, have in mind that a boundary doesn’t give you the power to control the other but just to be responsible. So that you and your spouse will have a balance in your relationship and also know how to love each other better

 

2 Forget closed relationship with the opposite sex: – It is proper to have friends and neighbors, but mind how you relate with then. A very close and intimate relationship with the opposite sex may lead to infidelity and cheating is the number one marriage destroyer.

 

3 Build a spiritual edge around your marriage: – Everything we want and need is in the name of Jesus.

If you need money, only God can give that. And if you need success in your marriage, all you need is God.

The weapon you should hold firm is prayer.  God said “ask anything you want and it shall be given.

 

That is a blank check for you to tell God how you want your marriage to be.

Make it a point of duty to pray for your marriage for 10 minutes every day and. God will take care of the rest.

 

4 Have a family budget: – A family budget is a plan by the couples on how their money would be spent. If you want to be free from financial stress, then make a plan from the start. Plan on having a family account where all the family expenses will be made from.

 

5 Keep no secret:- Keeping secret can bring more trouble to your marriage in the future especially when your partner finds out from outside.

Did you imagine how it feels to know that important information has been withheld from you?

Keeping “major ” secret is a good example of deceit and the more the time goes, the harder the pain you are inflicting on your partner.

 

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6 Have monthly relationship checkups: – It is good to have a monthly checkup on your marriage to be sure things are going the way they should.

By doing that, you should be able to know if the connection between the two of you is still strong, the communication and other areas of your marriage too.

 

7 Never sleep angry: nursing bitterness as well as un forgiveness can destroy any relationship or marriage. Continually practice forgiveness, no matter the gravity of offense. The book of Ephesians 4:26-27 ” Be quick to reconcile all disputes. Forgive your spouse always.

 

8 Have good and quality sex: – In Corinthians 7:5 God commanded couples to enjoy sex on a regular basis. He told us not to refuse sex at all only when both partners consent to that (maybe during fasting) One of the reasons people give for cheating on their spouse is lack of sex or lack of sexual satisfaction. If you are having challenges satisfying your spouse or sex doesn’t exist at all in your marriage then look for solution: you can search the internet.

 

9 Never discuss your marital challenges outside: If you are fond of telling your friends and your family members about the flaws of your spouse then you are causing more harm than good. One thing you should know is that telling people about your partners flaw will make then under rate him, but when you uphold him /her, then you are also making him great to other people.

 

10 Have regular date nights: -Never stop dating your partner.  Never think it is no more useful to date since you are marriage.  But the couple that have regular dates keep their love ablaze. Remember,  dating helped you when you were still planning to get married;  it will also help you achieve more passion now you are married.

 

11 Pay attention to your spouses needs: – Everyone has need and expects the needs to be met. Your spouse is one of them.

 

Always be on the lookout for those pressing needs of your partner and see how you can help to meet them.

 

12 Control your thought and emotions ‘- Never keep list of wrongs, have no resentment, never harbour thoughts of divorce, or infidelity. Remember if you let your thought rule you, you will see yourself making wrong decision.

 

Rounding up:

You should do everything possible to protect your marriage. Never assume everything will be the same way it was when you first got married. It takes daily nurturing to make a marriage successful.

Have a daily, weekly and monthly marriage checkups ,communicate effectively and take care of your spouses needs, all these will help to protect your relationship with your spouse.

 

You may also want to read

7 Rules of a happy Marriage

10 Reasons Marriage doesn’t work again

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

10 types of women you should never date or marry

getting married, girls you should never marryWhile every man prays to get married someday, yet no man wants to get married to any type of woman. Intact every man will do everything he can not to marry the wrong woman.

But in spite of the carefulness men still fall victim to that.

If you are planning to take the step now,

Don’t worry; I am here today to help you today.

In this post I want to give you some quick tips that will clearly show you what type of women you should never date or marry.

If you are ready, then, then let’s go!

Also read 7 Types of Men Perfect for Marriage

 

10 types of women you should never date or marry

 

getting married, what men want in women1 Men maker: – These are those chicks that always have a list and lots of expectations for you and will not take it easy with you until they are sure you dance to their tune

There are lots of them outside and you should avoid mingling with them.

To them, God did not mold you well and they want to do it themselves.

They usually start from trying to change your wardrobe, then your taste of music and finally you.

I am sure you’ll not want to marry that type of chick.

 

2 Jealous and suspicious chick: – It is true no woman wants to share his man, but it could be more problematic when she is suspicious about everything

 

Not only that being too jealous is an unpleasant experience, but being too jealous or overtly suspicious will make a woman to misinterpret what is happening and may take what is a normal event and change it into what she thinks.

That behavior can destroy your relationship

3 Professional Gossip: – Whether she is talking about other people in your family or co- Worker, gossip is gossip. But worst is that woman who gossips about the husband to her friends and families.

 

4 Want to have it all chick:- These chicks are always interested in what other people has not minding that they have the same

examples she has a red shoe, but she saw the Neighbor wearing the purple color and immediately she prefers that purple color. Any woman like that never gets satisfied about anything.

 

If you want to marry that type of woman then make sure your bank account is loaded because she will leave you when you can’t satisfy her needs.

Bad woman, wrong wife5  Domineering type of woman :These chicks wants to be the boss, they want to dictate what will happen in the home, they usually want to threaten the husband with divorce and always manipulate some arguments in other to bend their husband

It is a nightmare when you live with such a woman who wants to tell you what to do and what not to do, because they will leave no space to you for personal opinion

Bad cook, wrong woman6 Bad cook:- If you enjoy food like I do, then you have look for someone who knows how to cook good food.

7 A lazy chick: – Would you like it when you come back from work and see clothes litter everywhere, dishes piled up in kitchen and the whole house is unkempt.

Intact everything is exactly the way they were before you left.

The worst of it all is that your spouse is glued to the television

That is the life style of lazy woman.

8 Unfaithful type of chick: – Can you stand it you get reports from friends and loved once, or you find out yourself that your wife is cheating on you?

Getting married to an unfaithful woman is worst thing that can happen to any man, even your life is in danger.

9 High maintenance women: – A high maintenance woman is the same as high maintenance car. They are those types of girls who want many things (affection, money and other material things) just to make them happy. If you can afford everything then go ahead and marry her. But think twice.

Disrespectful wife10 Disrespectful women: – The number one ingredient to make any marriage successful is mutual respect. Marry a woman who is disrespectful and then you will live to be unhappy forever

The bible says in proverbs 21 verse 9 ” It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared by a quarrelsome wife.

So when your prospective wife is not regarding your opinions or “second guessing you “, it is a clear indication that some disrespect is thrown at you.

Think twice before committing yourself.

 Finally

If you want to enjoy your marriage, then be careful when selecting your partner.

This list of the types of girls you should never date or marry is just to help you achieve a successful marriage.

Just keep searching and you will find your heart desire

I am still your friend Murphyaik

See you at the top.

 

 

 

20 Simple but interesting Ways to brighten your Spouse’s day

make your spouse happy, make your marriage successfulThere is distraction everywhere and if you are not careful, you can forget about your spouse, I don’t mean forget that he/she exists, but you can get wrapped up in your daily schedule and work that you forget that the success of your relationship is dependent on the happiness of our spouse.

Study also shows that happy spouse can also be good for our health.

 

The truth is we must be diligent in our jobs. But you must also be active in making your marriage happy especially by making sure your spouse feel happy all the time

The Good news is that you don’t have to break a bank to brighten your spouse’s day, it is as cheap as these points I will share with you in a moment.

 

               make your spouse happy, happyn marriage tricks                       20 Ways to brighten your spouse’s day

 

1 Tell him/her how happy you are to wake up by his side:- Create the atmosphere of love early in the morning  by telling your spouse how wonderful you feel waking up by his side, it with make them feel love.

 

2 Send love text messages: – whether your partner is close to you or not, just picks up your phone and sends a love message to him or her telling how much you love and cherished each other.

 

3 Love not tricks:– Slip a love note on his box, pocket, or any other place he/she  can easily see it, let him know you love him so much and that you will be lonely when you are not together

 

4 Have 2 minutes hug earlier in the morning: – It may not be the most passionate hug; it is just about connecting with your spouse and to ensure your spouse that you care for each other.

5 Give them time alone: – Everyone needs some time to be alone, to think and do one thing or the other; giving your spouse some space can help to brighten his/her mood.

 

6 Surprise date:-  Well everyone loves surprises and I know your partner does too. All of a sudden, just plan an inexpensive but fun-filled romantic date.  That will get him /her smiling forever.

 

7 Complement:- Be the first to tell your spouse how beautiful or handsome they are especially after dressing up to go out.  You will notice a new bounce in his/her steps.

 

9 Show special interest: – It’s true you and your spouse have different interests, you love shopping and she loves reading, but you can as well show that you have special interest also in what he /she is doing.

 

10 Give a helping hand: – Whenever you think you partner is in a crossroad, ask and figure out how you can be of help. Do that with love

 

11 Be and act cheerfully: – Always be positive and  smile often, remember you don’t need to feel joyful to be cheerful said Hilbert.

 

12 Whisper to him or her in the ears: – Whisper softly to your partner that he/she is your best friend.

 

13 Be read to give:-  Sometimes your partner may casually mention  Something he or she likes, try to get those things if you can without mentioning it to him.

 

14 Make breakfast secretly and have it out when she/he is still in the bed.

 

15 Say thank you often: – For every little thing your partner does, do not hesitate to say thank you: remember, gratitude is a “powerful force

 

16 Just listen: – Whenever your partner is saying somehow, just leave everything else you as are doing and just listen .It shows that you value him/her more than anything else.

 

17 Do the Laundry: – You can help out in taking your cloths to laundry or to do it by yourself especially when your spouse is busy doing something else.

 

18 Prepare their favorite dish: – I am sure you know him /her well and you know their favorites mean.  You can brighten your spouse’s day by. Getting those favorite dishes ready will put a smile on his/her face.

19 Lit your face with a smile any time you see him /her coming your way

20 Call and inquire how he or she is doing whenever you are not together.

 

Finally:- Make all efforts to make your partner feel good at all times because that is the secret of a strong and lasting relationship.

I am still your friend murphyaik

Remember to share this post.

 

 

 

Proven ways to get a man propose marriage to you In less time

get the marriage you want, marry this year, make a man marry youYou have been dating that man for close to two, three, four years now, yet he is not making any move to let that important word “ marriage” out of his mouth; all he does is to give excuses.

From his actions lately, you are not even sure he is ready to work down the aisle with you or not.

If what I said earlier describes you, then I want you to know that you are not alone. A lot of ladies have passed through that before, and so many of them are in the mater as am writing this.

But, never worry again, because in this post, I am going to show you how and what you can do to get into that man’s head and inspire a marriage proposal in less time.

But you are the reason why he is not committing.

You may be surprised to hear that from me, but you are the reason he is not committing to you.

But, murphyaik, I have been with him for a while now cooking his foods, keeping his house clean and even offering him my body and yet you are blaming me.

Yes! All those things you mentioned are the reasons why you are the cause.

                        Here is why I said that.

No man can have a word with you, touch you, kiss you, and sleep with you when you didn’t give him that permission.

Simply put, you must believe that the power to get yourself the union, the marriage, the relationship you so wanted rests squarely on your shoulder.

You have the total control over every situation whether he can take you home; keep you for years without proposing.

We men need all these things from you, but, we want to actually know how easy it will be for us to get it.

From the first impression you give to any man, from every of your step, he will determine whether he will take you serious or play you.

Any man who gets to you now, will make a mental calculation of how cheap he can get you to bed, but it is left for you to make him know what you want out right.

                       Here is what you will do.

man of your drean, beast husbandHave a requirement and standard:- If you are out in the market for a real relationship, the type that will last a long time, you must have a requirement and standard for yourself.

You should be able to build a fence and get your standard up that not every man can have a feast in your domain, if you are not ready, then go to the other girl and not you.

Like I earlier said, whatever any man succeeded in doing to you is what you let him do.

Any man who is hanging around you does that for these two reasons.

  • To commit to you.
  • To have his way and dump you.

Whether he will succeed or fail depends totally on you.

But, men are very simple creature, tell us what you want us to do; we will try to do that especially when it is something to benefit us.

When any man come to you, he came to know what it will take him to get you; if he feels you are cheap to him, he will simply treat you the same and still tell his friends.

So when you have a standard set out, right from the onset of the type of relationship you want, if you want him to be early to dinner, tell him, if you want him to always say the truth, let him know from the beginning.

But here is the mistake you should avoid. Never be prompt in having the list of what you want a man to do for you.

Instead of telling him those things you like, tell him all you don’t like and allow him to find out what he is willing to do.

Believe me when I told you that no man on earth will determine to let you down without you showing him how you want him to love or how you expect him to treat you.

My wife told me right from the beginning that she detests lies, and I am trying my best to be that.

So go ahead and tell him what it takes to get your cookies, if it will be easy for him, he will stick around.

You are special to us if you make us treat you so.

best husband, make a man love youTell him exactly what you want:- Your age is not what it was in the time past and all you want now is to get married.

Then tell him out right that you don’t want any other thing than marriage and that you want to know what is in his mind about it.

Now you want to crucify me for what I just said now.

Murphyaik what if he run away when I tell him that? Well if he goes away, then that means he is not your man.

Seriously, you have to be willing to walk out and continue your life whenever you are not getting the type of commitment you desire from any man.

But you have stayed 5 years with him; yes, if he is not ready to commit, you cannot get him to commit with the number of years.

Many women have fallen for this; and still have their heart-broken later.

You know he is not planning to marry you and you are still hoping he will change his mind.

Instead of getting the blow later, why not get it when the relationship is still young so you can go on and find another person.

They said that men are like a buses; when you miss one, another one must surely come.

Let him know that your only plan is to settle down. I know it will not be easy, but you must have to do that.

He is absolutely not the only man on the earth and I strongly believe that your own man is out waiting for you.

You must really have to give up fears of losing him, because once you let go of fears, man will lose his power over you.

If what you want is a committed relationship, understand that your guy in question has to show that he really is ready and worthy for you.

That real man will be very willing to pay any price to have you as a wife.

Be ready for that life:- The life as a single and the life in marriage are two different lives.

There are thing you did and got away with when you are single, but you can’t get away with it when you are married.

So if you are really looking to settle down, then you must be ready for that.

For everything you hope to get in life, you must get ready for that.

You have to prepare your mind to receive the new change that is coming your way first.

Clear your memories of your past failed relationships, hurts and broken heart, drop all the old baggage.

Stop nursing in your mind that all men are the same and that this new relationship may end like the other one.

That simply shows that you have no room for a new relationship. This is the reason you can be with your real man and still feels lonely.

Believing the myth that all the good men have been taken and resolving to having many men to “ play with” will hurt you more.

So you’ve got to cheer your mind and “divorce” all bitterness you are nursing of a failed relationship so you can move towards and make room for him.

Learn all you can about marriage. Read books and search the internet about what marriage really is.

Have a good picture of what it is to get married. Did you see yourself wearing that wedding gown and walking down to the aisle? Understand that marriage has its sweet and bitter side.

Adopt the 90 plan as written by steve Harrison:- This is 90 days you want to get to know that man very well, in this learning about the man you are hoping to marry, you will not offer your cookies to him (sex).

But 90 day is so long a time you may say; sure it is but like I have said earlier, your real husband will be willing to wait, because he knows that all will be his when he finally marries you, after all it takes time to establish a good relationship.

Sex is only designed to be a “response to love and not a foundation for love” so build a strong fence to you cookies.

It is supposed to be a seal and strong hold for the already established relationship. If you give this to any man whenever you want, then you are building up pains for yourself.

That man who is reserved for you will not want to taste before committing; he will be willing to pay all the prices.

Even the bible in the book of proverbs: 31- 10 says that he that finds a virtues woman is so valuable and any man will be willing to pay his worth.

So you should stop casting your pearls to the swine.

Always treat sex as the only weapon you have to yourself, treat it as something special and let that man understand how special it is, and not like a piece of cake which someone can chew in a minute.

If a man is not ready to give you the 90 days to know him better and is bent on having sex, then he is not your man.

Within those 90 days, you should be able to know if he comes to play you or stick with you.

get a man to marry you, make any man fall in love with youTake care of yourself:- Men are too careful when it comes to marriage. They want to marry, but not to marry any type of girl. They are looking for that girl who knows how to take care of herself.

That tells them that the girl can take care of the home too.

The best thing you can do to attract that man is to take proper care of yourself. Always be conscious of how you look, when you look smart, your man will see you as that neat and smart girl.

Remember, the way you dress is the way you will be addressed.

Rounding up:- Don’t see sex as the only thing you have to offer to a man for marriage. You actually have so much to offer and remember, the man God prepared for you will always be ready to do anything he thinks will profit him in the future.

You can actually get into any man’s head and make him propose marriage to you in less than no time.

I am still your friend murphyaik.

See you at the top and remember to tell me what you think after reading this article.

Also read

Advice for the newlywed

7 Types of men perfect for marriage