15 Ways to be the Best Husband and Father in 2016

http://www.focusonthefamily.com/imagesAs 2015 is gradually coming to an end, you should be able to say this is how I performed as a husband and father.  How would you score yourself? 80%, 50%, 20%. Well, the answer depends on you. However, if you score is below 80%, then it is below average,  a good percentage for a successful marriage is 100%, that means everyone putting all effort to make the marriage work.
In this article, I want give you some tips that will help you improve yourself to be the best husband you can be in 2016. If you are ready, let’s ride on. Just get a glass of anything you like.

But let me worn you up front;
I know you have read so many self-help books,  you have attended so many seminars and yet everything still remain unchanged.
You should not threat this article as the same. If you know you will not make use of what I am writing here for you, let me know so that I’ll stop writing …..
Oh! You are still here?
Ok let’s go
Here is why you must be the best husband and father.
If your wife is not happy, your will not be happy and your marriage will be unhappy too:-  Behind every successful man, there must be a good woman. When a woman is happy with a marriage, she tends to do more to help make it stand firm.


For your wife to be happy, she must have confidence in you; she must be able to say “ yes “this the man I married. If your wife is no happy because of your attitude, things will not be the same again.
Improper attitudes will make her to keep distance from you and keeping distance means shutting the communication door and when there is no communication, the marriage is heading for a fall.

Like attract likes:- If you want your wife and your children to be the best you want them be, then you should make frantic efforts to be your best. Children especially learn very fast from the people around them; Most of the men that bully their wife learn that from their parents, also when you look at those divorced families, there must be a trace of divorce from their family. Live your life so that people around you can get the best of you.

It will bring peace in your marriage:- being the best father and husband will bring more peace, joy, love and commitments to your marriage. When you learn how, when and where to do the things you should do as a husband, everywhere becomes peaceful, and secured for marriage to thrive well.

If your marriage lack all these I have mentioned, then you need to check yourself properly.
                   What can you do to be the best husband and father in 2016?
Make a New Year resolution: At the end of every transaction, people take stocks to know if there is a profit or loss. You can also take stock of your marriage to know if you did the best to make your marriage work or you killed your marriage, you should be able to say “yes my marriage is much better than it was the year before.

Taking stocks of your marriage lets you know if you contributed positively or negatively to your marriage. What are those things you didn’t do well? Are there things you can drop or things you can improve on? I implore you to make a list of them and paste it wherever you can see it. Then start adjusting yourself to work with what you wrote in your list.

Discipline yourself to start:- It is very easy to make new year resolutions, but it is not that easy to put those resolutions to work. The only thing that will help you succeed with your New Year resolution is to discipline yourself to work towards your goal. It may require you to change your life style. There are things you need to give up, and there are those you will strongly hold on to.

Though it may not be an easy task when you want to change to be a good husband and father, but it is worth doing so that your marriage will move to another level.

Be a good protector to your wife: You may not need to fight for your wife, but one thing she always wants to assured of is that she is secured, and that she can rely, trust and find shelter in you. Your wife can trust you completely if she realize how transparent you are; that will make her to be open too.

Like I said before, you don’t have to fight for her, but those little things you do- like using the words like “us” instead of “I”, and also doing other things that will build confidence in her is enough to make her feel safe with you.

Be more romantic: Re-ignite the fire of love in your marriage. Many men stop dating their wives immediately after wedding, but that is improper. If dating helped you when you wanted to get married, you still need it to make your marriage stronger. Plan to have more romantic dates with her, find time to hug, cuddle, and kiss her. Research said that at least 20 minutes hug can add more passion to your marriage. So why not start now to be more romantic. If you are not sure of what to do, ask her to tell you all that can make her feel good.

Choose to please her daily:  I realized that it doesn’t take much to make your wife happy. All they want from you is to show that love. You may not give her a large pay check; just a little gesture can make her feel on top of the world. By now you would have known those little things she likes; you can write them down and make efforts to do them. You will be amazed at what joy will feel her heart.

Make effort to know her very well:- It may surprise you if I look you in the face now and tell that you don’t know anything about your wife. From research, most of the marriages that lasted long are those that know themselves well.

Can you tell what your wives favorite book is?, what  type of food does she like, where would she want to be on her leisure?. Knowing those things will help you be the best husband and father this coming year.

Always give her undivided attention:- What has been your attitude during your conversation with your wife? Probably you are among those that will have their mobile phone or laptop in the hand or may be watching the television. Your wife wants to have your undivided attention, she wants to know that you are interested in what she is saying.

The best way to do that is to be a good listener. Never interrupt her while she is taking.
If you think what she is saying is not correct, find a better time to tell her, but that should be gently and with wisdom.

Prioritize your marriage:- Let your marriage be the first thing that matters you. It is amazing how people neglect their marriage because of job or business; that will only hurt your marriage and remember, your marriage is where you will go back to when the work is gone. If you are keen about being a better husband and father, then prioritize your marriage. Let your friends know that you love your marriage more than anything in your life.

Get home on time when you close from work. Some men prefer to hang out and get home late; if you are among those, then it is time to stop; now you want to be a good husband.

Always see her best side and not the bad side:- It is true she has some flaws, but that is because you focus on that. If today you will make up your mind to count the good side of your wife, you may find out that it surpassed the bad, Concentrate on the good and forget the bad. That’s when you’ll start appreciating her.

Always learn to confront your problems:- Problems are inevitable in any relationship, but while some couples solve their problems amicably  and move forward, others run away from theirs; but running away from your marital problems is the best way to make your marriage fail. Research shows that inability to solve any marital problem within the next 30 minute is the reason for divorce. Never go to be without solving your problems

Always confront your problems. Get help from a marriage counselor or therapist if there is need for that and never be ashamed to tell someone; maybe you can get quality help from them. A closed mouth they say is a closed destiny.

Learn to compliment and stop complaining about her:- Everyone want to be complimented and your wife is one of them. Instead of complaining about her inabilities, why not compliment her. Tell her when she did something good, after dressing, compliment her, tell her how beautiful she look, tell her how you love to have her as your wife. When she is out, send love massages to her. That will make her to change.

 Decide to spend time with your family: If you love your family, then spending quality time with then is one of the ways you can demonstrate that love. Spending time will give you opportunity to know and understand your family well. Although there are limited time for parents to do that, but you should create time if you must be the best father.

Limit your expectation and stop being dominating:– I know every man expects much from their wife. Most marriage is so much based on one expectation or another; it maybe physical, emotional, behavioral, physical and financial and other expectation.

But, no matter what your expectations are, never allow it to overshadow the bond that holds you and your partner together.

If you want her behave in a particular way in a kind of situation, you should find a better way to explain to her instead of nagging. Never be too domineering, demanding or controlling because of the different views or opinion about anything.

Support your financially:- Your  family have needs and they are not expecting an outside to meet their financial need. It is your responsibility as a husband and father. In 2016, you should try very hard to be financially stable in other to take care of your family. Let her know your current financial state and try and do what you can do to meet their needs.

Be faithful and don’t cheat: No partner feels good when the other cheated on him or her. Extra marital affair is one of the best reasons for divorce today. When you cheat it means your wife is not good for you and that you prefer other women to her. But a good husband will be faithful and never cheat on her wife. If you truly want to be one, then stay faithful.

All these are my opinion for being a good husband and father in 2016. There may be others thing I forgot to add. You can add your own opinion in the comment section. We will love to read yours

Meeting The Most Important Emotional Needs Of Your Marriage

emotional needs, marriage emotional need, meeting emotional needsDear, if your marriage is not working as you desire, there is a tendency that you have neglected the most important emotional needs of your marriage and I will prove it to you in a moment.

You see, every marriage has needs, and those needs are so important that if they are neglected, it will affect the marriage negatively. Most couples are so ignorant of these important emotional needs, which is why there are so many cases of disagreements, infidelity and divorce.

In this article, we are going to look at those important emotional needs and also look at how you will fill them out in a way that will help your marriage stand firm.

All those need are contain in what Steven Covey an American bestselling author called “Emotional Bank account” which is where all the love that sustain a relationship is deposited.

: – )

Howdy: Download my 32 Pages Free E Book on How to Have A more Marital Happiness. Get it here


If the “emotional tank” is full the love you shared with your spouse will burn brightly, but no marriage run well if there is an empty tank.

So how much love and care do have deposited on your “Emotional bank account”? Believe it or not, the success or failure you’ll experience in your relationship/ marriage depends on the answer you will give. Simply put, the more you have deposited on this account, the more love will be triggered and the more your marriage will succeed; for that is the most important ingredient for a happy marriage and love burns from the emotional reservoir to keep the marriage flame burning.

Everyone has an emotional account, which just like the ordinary bank account is blank from the beginning, but as we live our lives, we either make a deposit or withdraw from it.No one can make deposit on his or her account, it is meant for someone else to deposit on it. Your wife can make deposit and withdraw from your account and you can do the same on your wife and both of you can deposit on your children too.

However in this emotional bank, monetary unit are not used, but trust, care and others. In marriage or relationship, whenever we meet the need of our spouse, we make a deposit in his/her emotional tank, and when you fail to meet the need, you have made a withdrawal.

One of the ways you can continually stay in love is by making sure you make more deposit instead of withdrawals and every single infidelity /affair is obviously a product of empty emotional bank reservoir.


happiness in marriage,emotional needs

We have been taught that love comes first in marriage, and we also focus so much on that too, but nobody told us that we must nurture, feed and water our marriage by meeting those little needs of our union.

When I realized the impact having more trust deposited into this account can make in a marriage, I started looking for how to help other couples understand these too; I visited so many couples,asking question about what their spouse can do to then that will make him or her fulfilled, or how would they want their spouse to take care of them?

Taking care of needs have great meaning when it comes to how far a marriage can go: it simply means doing whatever there is you can to make each other happy, what extra mile you can go because you want your spouse to be happy. As insignificant as that word can be, any marriage that lacks it, is very close to a big fall, if not dead already.

But no one got married to be miserable after sometime. Everyone begins with in the eyes and with so much hope, and dreams to have a successful marriage. But at a time things started crumbling down.

Amazing isn’t it?

In the earliest stage of your marriage, both of you made so many promises of taking care of each other, and you were sure you want to do just that because the love was so strong, and each of you were so much motivated to see each other happy. But how many of those promises did you keep till now? Little did you know that the very moment you stopped caring for one another, all the love that existed will be lost in a twinkle of an eye.


                              emotional tank,emotional reservior   Why am I talking about “Care” now?

You may be surprised why I am talking so much about this now

Why should I be telling you about taking good care of your partner now? You see the truth is that you love your spouse so much, but you may have neglected the most important things that matters to him/her.

And as I am writing this article, you are still not sure about what it means to proper care of your spouse.

You believed love is everything; you believed you have been so much committed to making your marriage happy.

Well, all of them are good, but that is not all there is to care for your partner in a better way, I am talking about taking care of your spouse most important emotional need.

Question is what is emotional need

What is this “Most important Emotional Needs”?

These are th0se types of need you have that when it is well satisfied, it makes you feel so good and so contempt from deep within you, but when it is not well taken care of, you’ll feel very bad and frustrated.

These needs are so important to you that you can give everything to get them solved;it is those cravings in your heart that when someone fulfills it, you wouldn’t mind falling in love with that person.


By now, you would have seen where I am going. : )

But let me tell you a story that will help drive it into your sub-conscious.

I have told this story before in my article 11 ways you are unknowingly destroying your wife and killing your marriage; but I think it will be good to use it and show you what solving emotional problem can do to someone

The story is all about a woman who was knock down by motorbike; though she sustained just minor injuries, but someone was around to help take her to hospital; there and then the woman called the hubby to tell her of the incident and husband showed interest by asking her to go to the hospital for treatment, and never bothered to call again. But the other man that offered her help called again and again and again just know how she is doing; that’s how it all stated and the woman became a good friend to the man because he did what the husband was supposed to do.

In that story, there an emotional need of care, but the woman could not them from the husband, but from an outsider.

I am not praising her for her actions; I was only telling you what happens when someone’s most emotional need is met.

However, everyone have basic emotional need it is not just for the women, men too have theirs


Lemma show you another true life story that will drive in what I am trying to portray

This is a true live narrative from one of the blogs I enjoyed reading.

Hello Dearest Stella,

its an honour to share my chronicle of hope with you and my fellow SDKers.
I met my hubby to be when I was 20 and an undergraduate. We courted for 4yrs and got married 2years ago. Our marriage is blessed with a beautiful daughter.
Before I finally agreed to choose my hubby over all the men who were asking for my hand in marriage, I considered the following attributes which are;

His stand with God.

Read the full story from the source

From what you read, you can figure out what the most important emotional need of those two examples where. And to be precise with you, you must start looking deep into your marriage/ relationship from now on to understand what the need of your marriage is; if you really want to bullet proof your marriage from infidelity.

Another question is

How do you know what these needs are?

Don’t worry that is why I am here

There are so many different emotional needs: like need for thanksgiving parties, going to movies, and many others.

But the fact is that everyone is uniquely made and so the needs are different as well, that’s why it is very impossible to understand where to start when you want to help couples that are passing through emotional challenges in their marriage.

emotional need, fammily needs

As I went about asking couples how they prefer their partners to care for them, I realized that-the women’s most import emotional needs were the men’s least need which became a little challenging. That’s the reason it seem hard for couples to meet each others need but in other to get things right I had to classify all they listed into one category, and that is what I called the most important emotional needs.

Here is a list the basic emotional need

  • Openness and honesty:Every partner want relation where there is honesty and openness. Being honest in marriage creates better and stronger relationship to couples. Honesty brings security in marriage and makes couple to be bonded emotionally. They know very well that they can trust each other.


Couples that openly share their past, their present plans and activities as well their future are always able to make quality decisions. However, when there is no honesty and openness in a marriage, there is always fights and quarrel.


  • Commitment: Any marriage that has stayed a long time has a level of commitment present. This is when couples are so willing to do anything there is in other to see that their marriage is moving on well.


In marriage, there will always be times when all things may seem upside down. At that time, your ability to stand firm depends on how committed you are. That is why every partner wants to see that commitment in the other partner. When one partner is more committed than the other, things don’t normally move well.

  • Helping in domestic works


  • Admiration:How do you admire your spouse? How often have you looked at his or her face and say “dear you are the best thing that has ever happened to me and I bless the day I found you.


Y0ur spouse want you to admire him or her, and I will encourage now to make a list of all you admire in your spouse. Understand that the hallmark of every relationship is to admire your spouse always.


  • Physical attractiveness:Physical attractiveness is view differently in every relationship; while some partners view it as a temporal thing which should only exist in the beginning of a relationship; some think it is something that should always be there in other for the marriage to be stronger.


My take on this is ,if being physically attractive to your spouse will increase the deposit to your “emotional bank account”, then make it a point of duty to make yourself always attractive. Eat well, dress well and neat too.


  • Affection: Affection is a type of love that exists between people that makes them feel so close, safe and very well cared for. Affection is that emotional bank deposit of love that makes your spouse feel very good about your marriage any you. I call it love in action. Marriage thrives well when there is a strong affection, and that’s why every partner must work towards building more affection in their marriage.


  • Sexually active: One of the things every couple has to themselves and are not expected to share with an outsider is sex. Somehow some couples have lose their sexual life. It is either they are not satisfying each other, having sex at all or that the sex life is boring.


To be sure that you are having the most important emotional need of your marriage met, you must try everything you know to revive sex.


  • Companionship:Being a good companion is what every partner want in any relationship. When you were starting out in marriage, you were so interested in winning him/her, you did all you can to impress and charm your partner.


Now that you are married you thought they are not important anymore. The truth is that your partner expects you to be the best friend he/she has; you must be a good companion too.Do take your relationship for granted.


  • Financial support:Finance plays a very big role in marriage, and most people got married to their spouse because of the financial security to expect to get from their spouse. When a partner is not getting that financial securities he/she hoped for before getting married, probably due to the partners under employment or unemployment, they become unhappy and frustrated.


At times, these are not seen at the beginning of the marriage but when it has lasted for a while of even after the children. Remember we are talking about meeting your marriage most important emotional need and also remember that I said that we usually fall in love with anyone that meets our most important need.



  • Conversation:Conversation is another emotional need every couple craves for. However, so many couples have neglected this and have their marriage broken.

Conversation is one aspect of marriage that can never be toyed with, it is during this time of communication that partners share their views and opinion with each other. If your marriage lacks conversation today, you are not alone. But just understand that you can restore it by learning the skills.


You will agree with me that those are the more common emotional need, but there may be some variable since every marriage is not created equal

When your spouse has one of those needs, and it is not met, he/she may want to swallow and suffer with it, or seek somewhere else to get the satisfaction they need. Which do you prefer?

Rounding up:

In other to make sure that the most emotional needs of your marriage is not taking for granted, you have to figure out what more your spouse’s needs are and see a way to take care of them. Remember, all you are seeking is to bulletproof your marriage for infidelity.

Bonus Read

11 ways you are destroying your wife and killing your marriage.

The Marriage Sweeteners

15 Hilariously Interesting Romantic date ideas for couples

Romantic dates with your partner,have a romantic date,romantic date ideasHow often do you have romantic dates with your spouse? Did you know that dating is not just for the singles? Have you ever thought of giving your spouse a surprise and heart worming moments of joyful experiences? Then this article will guide you; at the end you will be able to have some good romantic dating ideas to yourself.

Who is this article for? It is good for all of you who want to re- kindle the fire of love in their marriage. If you’ve been having romantic dates with your spouse since you got married, there is a tendency that you have run out of romantic dating ideas now, so this article is also for you.

Never stop dating because you are married, or allow your dating becomes a routine. It is not as if there is something wrong with that, but everybody gets tired of doing the same thing every time.
But don’t worry; I am here to help you out and in a moment from now.


I will show you some funky jaw dropping romantic dating ideas that will take your relationship to another level.
But why is dating still important for the couples? Is dating not for singles planning to marry?

Well I will tell you.
Firstly, I will want you to understand that dating is important to both the single as well as the couples. If dating helps the prospective partners to get to a place where they want to marry each other, then couples need it also to make their marriage stronger.

Let me tell you this little story. : )

Before I got married to my wife, I use to make time available to spend with my wife; staying together helped us to understand and know each other very well. However, when we got married, things took a new shape; everyone becomes busy with one daily activities or the other and then we forgot everything about romance.

But every successful marriage needs consistent nurturing in other to keep the fire burning, and dating your spouse in weekly or monthly basis will help to re-ignite that fire that brought the two of you together.

A study conducted by a group known as National Marriage Project at a university in Virginia, reveals that married couples who dates frequently, usually have a lower divorce rate. And also have the quality of their marriage increased.

Here are more reasons you should not overlook dating in your marriage:

It provides an opportunity for you and your wife to have good communication: You know the importance of communication. No marriage thrives without that. But dating gives you and your partner opportunity to be together and being together, you will have more rooms to communicate.

It increases the commitment in your marriage: Having romantic dates provide avenues for both of you to be open to each other about the likes and the dislikes, and this help both of you to make up for the wrongs thereby building a strong emotional bond between the two of you.



– Everyone feel secured one more time: Having romantic dates will make your spouse see you from a different side. His /her confidence will increase, because now there is a strong evidence of love and security

I am writing this article because I am interested in your marriage and want to share some romantic dating Ideas that will help you rejuvenate your marriage. Dating your spouse all over again will make him or her see the other side of you and that is what I want to happen to your own spouse.

If you are ready to go that extra mile, then here is how to go.

Planning a good romantic date with your spouse

Although you don’t have to strain the budget to organize a quality romantic dates with your spouse, but your plan is to let your spouse know that you are still very much in love with him/her; so it necessary to get yourself prepared for that moment.

Here are ways to plan
(1) Make a list: You can’t just start out for a romantic date without planning how to go; even when you want to make it a surprised package, planning is still the first thing to do.

It is good you make a list of those things your spouse enjoys doing every day, what his/her favorite food, what is his/her best colour. These may sound simple, but they are the little things that will make the dating enjoyable for the two of you.


All you need to make it memorable is to know those little activities that make his/her hearts beat in happiness. So look for them and memorize or write them down.


(2) Chose a conducive time: Because of the busy and tight schedule, couples somehow find it hard to have little time for themselves. However, to have a romantic date with your partner, you must choose a time that is good for the two of you. You don’t have to let the cat out if you want to make it a surprise date; just be creative and find a way to know when your partner will be free for the date.


(3) Have a dress code: Although this may not be all that necessary, but since you want to make is a memorable date, then you have to choose what to wear. Look for something beautiful and comfortable. You can choose any outfit that reminds you of the good childhood days.


(4) Choose the menu items you want to prepare: If it is going to be a house dating, then select what you want to cook. From the list of your spouse favorite food, decide on what you want to prepare for the date.


(5) Choose places to go: Decide from where you want to go for the date. If it will be done in the house, then get everywhere ready. And if you are going somewhere else, then decide it from the beginning. Should there be any reason to make another choice of venue that depends on you also.



Remember having a date with your spouse don’t have to cost you fortune, just plan it on a budget.
Now you have planned you dating; it is time to have the romantic date proper.

I have put together for you a list of 15 great romantic date ideas for you.



                       15 Romantic date ideas

1 Go to beach and spend some time: So many love stories were inspired by the ocean and it so blissful when you spend a good hour surfing and enjoying the cool sea breeze with your partner. You can hold your partner’s hand and walk on the soft beach sand as you are sipping your drinks, Splash water on each other. That will be a very romantic date to remember always. Isn’t it

2 Go to the zoo: If both of you are lovers of animals, then visiting your local zoo may be another wonderful date to have. That will give you an opportunity to get really close to some of the most interesting and different species of animals on this planet earth.


It doesn’t matter where you live, there must be a zoo around you can visit. So what are you waiting for? Just try to get the best look of the animals Let it be another wonderful adventure for you and your spouse.

3 Visit the Museum: Visiting a museum can make the best romantic date for you and your spouse because of its affordability.


If you love arts, museum will be the best place to see lots of arts, but have in mind that seeing the art is not the reason for going there, but because you want to spend quality time with the one you love, and the museum is just to facilitate and provide the backdrop for that.

In other to make proper plan of how to maximize your time in the museum, first choose which museum you want to visit, the amount of time to spend there (usually 1 hour 15 Min) will be a good time to spend there.

4 Explore new horizons: There are places around your street you have been dreaming of visiting someday; this may be a opportunity for you and your spouse to do that together. Just hold your partners hand and work down to those area. Whenever you visit a new place together, it will give you another opportunity to learn new things about each other. Have your picnic bag in your hand as you go for the exploration.

5 Climb the trees in your compound: Maybe while you were growing up, you loved to climb trees, and probably you partner love that too. So to do things that take you down the memories of your childhood days, then climb tree, pluck the fruits and share with your partner. It will make you feel younger again.

6 Visit restaurant or fast food: Ask your wife to forget about preparing lunch so two of you can go out and eat together ( though not all the time) However, since you want to have a special moment to spend, then you can visit any restaurant in the neighborhood and just share a meal together.

7 Go window shopping: The purpose of this is not to spend money buying anything, but to learn about each others tastes and choices. Visit any Mall around (with different stores) and go to where they have nice window displays.


Remember you are having fun, so do not rush things; just take your time to go from one end to the other. Excite your eyes and you can take notes too.

8 Cook: Dating doesn’t have to be all outside; you can have a wonderful dating experience indoor. Instead of going to a restaurant or fast food outlets, you can have a wonderful meal prepared in your house. All you have to do is just to make the environment different from the normal one.

Set the dining table with nice flowers, play soft background music and have a wonderful date with the one you love.

9 Go to sport and game center: If your spouse has a favorite game or sport, then look for where they are having a tournament or sport competition and watch it together.

10 Go to a park and swing: I can still remember how exciting it used to be when our parents will take us to a park and how we enjoyed using the playground. You can try it out with you partner, just go to any playground you know and slide or swing. Have your best beverages in your picnic bag, so you can cool off when you get tired.

11 Take a drive: Get into your car and drive out with your partner, not going anywhere in particular, but just to look at the local scene and the nature.

12 Visit Cinema: Visit any cinema of your choice and watch movies that captivate your interests.

13 Take a trip to a nearby country: Nothing feels good like going out and leaving everything behind the home, the usual street, and country entirely. Both of you will have time to explore it all. Make it a memorable one; eat their locale foods and dance to their local music. It is a lot of fun when you do that.

14 Go to a dance rehearsal: If there is any dance academy around you, go there and join them in their rehearsals; it doesn’t matter if you cannot dance, all you want is to have an exciting moment with your partner.

15 ? ? ?

Help me add the 15th point. Won’t you?.
What is your favorite romantic date idea activity that is not included in this article?
Make it the 15th point. Everyone will be glad to read your dating idea.

? If no, then get it from here.

How to Help your Depressed wife get over the sickness

help your depressd wife, depression, depression helpIf your wife is going through depression and you are looking for a way to help her get over her depression, then reading this article could be one of the first steps you’ll take to help her.

I said this because I have taken some time to provide you with tips that will clearly show you how to help your depressed wife out of the sickness. Although it may be a little bit tasking when you are dealing with your partner’s depression, but thank God there are things you can do to help her out and it is not as hard as you may imagine.


By the time you finished reading this article, you will be having first-hand information which will clearly show you what to do when you want to help your wife out of depression.


Depression is one type of sickness which when it affects one spouse, before you know it, the other partner starts feeling the impact, and even the marriage is not left out too.Simply put; when your partner is depressed, the whole marriage is depressed.


But what is depression?

Depression is a very serious mood disorder that inflicts a protracted feeling of loss of interest, fatigue, and sadness to someone. Depression also affects someone’s thinking and behavior, and can also lead to other emotional and physical trouble.


If your wives is depressed, and you feel it is affecting you also, and you seriously want to help her out of it, then your first step could be to get to know the right diagnosis, the level of her depression as well as the treatments that will be more effective in restoring her to her normal life.


The signs and symptoms of depression are not seen most of the times until thing get so worst that it became a serious problem to everyone.


Here are few signs:

(a). Excessive sleeping
(b) Sometimes lack of sleep
(c ). Eating too much.
(d) Loss of interest.
(e) Insomnia.
(f). Fatigue.
(g). Restlessness


By having this information I am sharing with you now at your disposal, then this is the time to step up to save your marriage and your partner, because it will destroy your marriage if you let it linger a little longer.


Although depression on itself does not destroy a marriage, but if it is not dealt with very fast, it will affect other areas of your marriage. Research shows that depressed partners are very likely to divorce.


In America, 19 million of the population is going through divorce now and according to Riders Digest, 65% of them named depression as the number one challenge in marriage; so tell me why you should allow your marriage to be ruined when there are things you can do now to help your wife and her depression


Here is how unattended depression affects marriage negatively
Lately, researchers said that when depression is not treated on time, there is a likelihood that couples will have an unhappy marriage, this is because depression affects someone mentally, and mental health and unhappy marriage goes hand in hand.


When your wife is affected by this depression, she will be having less satisfaction, less happiness and contentment with your marriage as well you the partner. Everything you do to make the marriage beautiful may all be completely dis satisfactory to her.


When your wife is going through depression, it usually look like there a hard dark and a heavy metal that is placed on your neck and sometimes you will feel as though the weight is much on you; sometimes you feel isolated, often times is loss of sexual and emotional intimacy; in fact there is no doubt to the amount of negative impact it can bring to your marriage.


Depressed partner often withdraws from all those activities that usually bring joy and pleasure to marriage; most times it is loss of sleep, or too much sleep, eating too much and the sex life becomes nonexistence and there is a great feeling of isolation and finally separation.


The worst of it all is that your depressed wife may sometimes feel that she is no more in love with you, which is what affects the whole marriage.


Thankfully, there are few things you can do to help your depressed wife and I am going to share then here in a minute.




                   Here is how to help her

One of the steps you can take in helping your depressed wife is to understand fully what depression is, what stage of depression is she really in?And what are the things that are causing her to be depressed?


Talking to some of your friends about it may help a great deal, probably some of them may have one or two persons that passed through that before, and may offer some ideas that could be of great help.


Although it may not be wise enough to discuss your marriage to outside, but remember, that this could be the best thing that can save your wife from depression. However, remember you have to know how the sickness started in the first place and what level of depression she is suffering from.




Ask yourself these questions can help.
– When did she start feeling like this?: It is obvious this did not start today, it may have started some days, months or years back. Knowing exactly when she started changing will do a lot when you want to help her. And from that, you should be able to know what brought about the depression.



– Although some types of depression do start from birth, but if your wives did not start in her early life, then something would have been the cause



– What happened that made her to start feeling this way: Depression don’t just start, something may have been the reason for the sudden change of attitude. When you are able to know when it all started, then you can say for sure what happened to her.


Getting answers to these few questions will make your journey to helping your wife a little bit easier. Now you have taken your first step in helping her out of depression, then here are other things that will help her get back to a normal life. Remember, it may be a little hard to convince her to schedule an appointment with the Dr, because depression saps motivation and lots of energy from them, so even getting them book an appointment with the doctor may be a little harder.


This is just a call for you to be more prepared for what you want to do; building your spirit to be resilient is all you need in other to get your love one accept she has the problem as well as making her see that all will be well shortly.


Statistic confirmed that 20 % of the depressed will be very embarrassed to look for help that is always why they suffer in silence for a long time. They always believe they will be alright if they want to, they think it is a personal dullness and that they can “snap out of it” but really depression is not in any way related to personal willpower or weakness or even character.
That is the reason you should plan how you will talk to



convince her. The way you talk to her matters a lot when you want to convince her.
If you don’t know how to start, here are few tips on how to talk to her



Like I said earlier, it is not easy when you want to convince your depressed spouse to do anything, but you must try and say the right things to her if you really want to support your depressed loved one.


– Let her understand that she is not alone: All the depressed persons have one thing in common, and that is to isolate themselves for their relatives, friends and family which helps to compound their condition, however, when you let you depressed wife understand that she is not alone, and that you are right there beside her, that may add a new hope to and her and may help her condition get a bit better.


– Have you thought about seeing the Doctor?

– Is there anything I can do to help you? If you say this to her, she will understand that you are fully available and ready to help.



– You are so important to me and your life is important to me too



– It is true I don’t understand how you are really feeling, but I want to help you get better.


Remember all these are just to make her accept to visit a doctor with you. And when she fully accepted, then you have taken the proper steps to help her.


It is then left with the doctor to conduct a test on her to determine the level of depression she is suffering from.
There are different levels of depression.


There are different types of depression, and knowing which level your wife is currently on, will determine the nature of treatment you will recommend for her.

Here are they


– Major depression (Major depressive Disorder) MDD: This is diagnoses when someone has a constant feeling of despair and hopelessness. Anyone with this type of disorder finds it very hard to work, sleep or sturdy.


– Dysthymia: People that have this type of disorder usually have little or no joy at all in their lives. They can hardly remember a time in their life when they feel happy, inspired or even excited. This type of disorder starts from the earlier age of the person suffering it.

– Bipolar Disorder (manic Disorder): This type of disorder tends to be a generic type of disorder. The symptoms for this are far from the normal ups and down people go through daily.



There are many other types of depression; but these are the few common once.

Another way you can help your wife to come out of depression is to use foods that are good in managing depression.
Researchers have proved that good dietary programs can have a very big effect to our moods. They proved that diets that lacks the essential vitamins like-


– Vitamin B: This is very good in preventing depression, fatigue as well as anxiety. That’s why it is necessary to take vitamin b complex on a daily basis. Main source of vitamins is grains and animal protein. Vitamins like B-9, b12 and b-6 helps “emotional health”



– Vit B12 as well as lack of folic acid, pantothenic, and biotin is likely to cause depression.



– Magnesium– This help in reliving anxiety. You can get magnesium form vegetables and nuts



– Vitamin B-6 – This is good for the formation of a good level of neurotransmitters, which helps the brain to transmit signals from a neuron to the other.



– DHN : This is a member of Omega-3 family and it is very important component of the nerve cells which helps in transferring information.

If your wife feel sad all the time, then taking Omega(3) fatty acid can help to combat it. A good source of omega 3 is fatty fish such as sardines, salmon etc.


Food and good dietary plans can help your wife against depression, and poor nutrition triggers the disease.

In conclusion:
If your wife is suffering from depression, one of the ways to help her is to give her all the supports and encouragements you can offer, to make her understand that she is not alone. Apart from referring her to a good psychologist, you can help her through proper diets and you will see the changes in her condition.

I hope this article will be of great help to you.