More on what a woman must do to build a happy and successful marriage

There are absolutely loads of things every woman must do to make her marriage a happy and successful one. Women alone can not build it alone. It takes both the wife and husband to do it together, through their commitments.
However, the contributions of a woman or a wife in building a strong and happy family seem to be more enormous than that of men. It has been said that behind every successful man, is a woman, simply put women or rather wives has a lot more to do in making their husband successful, as well as making their marriages a happy one too.
Below, I have taking time to list some important things you must do as a woman to help make your marriage a happy one. Remember these are not a quick fix, but if you will start implying them from today, gradually you will start seeing the impact.
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(1). Make up your mind to be who you are:- The success of every marriage starts when a wife choose to be who she is, instead of pretending to be who she is not. Firstly. Learn to love yourself. Never think you can change your personality in order to make your man love you better. Be yourself and love yourself first and people will love you.
(2).See yourself as the very and only key to the success of your marriage :- Until you see yourself as the only person that is capable of building your marriage, your marriage may not stand. Even when your husband is not too committed, choose to be committed. This will make your spouse to start thinking of how to change. Start now by writing down those things you have to do to make a difference in your marriage.
3. Finally, give! Give!! and Give!!!:- I decide to include this because I know it is very important in making a good marriage. Most women when they notice that their spouse look so nonchalant about their marriage, they give up on their own contributions, because they believed they are giving too much while the other party is not doing anything at all. My advice to you, is to go on and on. There is nothing you can give to your marriage that is too much, when you refuse to give because your spouse is not, the fire may be so down that the worst may start happening.
You can actually have the marriage of your dream, if you will start implementing these things starting today. So go on and do them.

 

How Does it Feel to Have a Happy Marriage

Being happily married is certainly one of the most wonderful feelings you can ever experience. However, too many couples lose that feeling as their marriage wears on for a variety of reasons. Because feelings, even those of love can be rather abstract, it can be difficult to fully understand whether you are in a happy marriage or not.
How do you know if your marriage is a happy one? If you are asking this question, then you may have some doubts whether it is true or not. What follows are the signs of being in a happy marriage. These are the seemingly little things that happily married couples do on a regular basis that helps strengthen their marriage.

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Being Positive
It’s amazing how positive statements such as “I’m so happy to be married to you” can make you feel happy. Positive reinforcement when expressed from the heart is a wonderful feeling that is part of a happy marriage. Positive statements happen on a regular basis, sometimes a daily one depending on the couple. But a few days should not go by without you or your partner reinforcing the happiness you feel about being together.
Enjoying Intimacy
While sexual intimacy generally becomes less frequent as married couples grow older, it is still something that both look forward to enjoying. Good, healthy sexual relations between married couples is a hallmark of happiness in a relationship. It is when we don’t look forward to being with our partners that issues and doubts start to creep in.
Complimenting your Spouse
Another feeling of being in a happy marriage is the support you give and receive for each other, especially the simple things. Thanking your partner for making a great dinner, telling them how you appreciated picking up an extra item from the store, appreciating the effort they made in getting ready to go out and so on. The little compliments over time brings you closer together because it builds up how you value each other.
Avoiding Attacks
Feeling happy in a marriage means avoiding situations where you put down or attack your spouse unnecessarily. For example, if they are spending a lot of time watching TV or surfing the internet, your reaction might be “Will you get off that computer for once!” This actually puts some distance between you and your partner. Instead, a statement like, “Could I spend some time with you” to lure them away from the computer or TV is much more inviting and encourages happier dialogue.
Understanding that all Marriages will End
It seems rather sad to think that all marriages end in either death or divorce and no couple have ever avoided either one. Still, this realization helps people get the most out of their relationship and treat each other with respect and care. The old saying, “Live every day as if it were your last” applies to marriages as well. You want each day to feel special and helping each other to feel that way as well.
For happy couples, this is how it feels to be in a happy marriage. It takes time, work and effort, but the results are definitely well worth it.

How Being Married and Feeling Single Can Harm your Happy Marriage

happy marriage, divorce,couples,happiness in marriageIts may come as a surprise that many people in a marriage still feel single even after several years. Such a feeling is generally not a good one as it works against what a marriage is all about. Recognizing that you still feel single in a marriage is really the first step towards addressing the issue. However, many couples feel that divorce is the only solution when this situation occurs.
What is Feeling Single?
Basically, you are taking actions, making decisions and doing the things based on your own self interest rather than looking at it from a couple’s point of view. To put it simply, you think of “I” instead of “We”. While couples are comprised of two individuals who have their own set of goals, the difference between those who think as a couple as opposed to being single is based on putting your own self interest above your marriage.
For example, when you are offered the chance to play poker with the guys, do you quickly say “Yes” and then wonder how you can get this past your spouse or do you make your decision based on what’s in the best interest of you and your partner?
Many happy marriages have both the husband and wife pursuing their own interests, but all decisions are tempered by making them from the point of view of the couple, not the individual.
How Can Feeling Single Harm your Marriage?
There are many ways that feeling single can harm your marriage. This is because such behavior does not happen suddenly, but over time when the passion of being together at first becomes replaced with simply living with each other. Unless a marriage is stoked on occasion the fire will soon die out and leave you with nothing.
Thinking Only for Yourself: This is the most obvious sign of feeling single in a marriage and one that can wreck your relationship. Basically, you make decisions that do not take into consideration your partner. But more than that, you look at your spouse as someone that you have to deal with, not as someone with whom you make decisions together.
Lack of Communication: Being single means keeping a lot of things to yourself. The thought process is that they only affect you and that they are none of your spouse’s business. A happy marriage means communicating about what is affecting you with your spouse because it affects the both of you.
No More Couple Time: Good relationships are built on spending time together away from the kids and responsibilities of your lives, even for only a few moments. Since you are thinking for yourself, such time is not spent in working on your relationship, but rather in what else you would like to be doing.
Recognizing the signs of thinking for yourself is the starting point of working out issues with your spouse. Such actions can start quite small, a text message here or a gift there to let them know how your really feel about them and if you work on it then the attraction that brought you together will start up again.

How to Locate a Good Marriage Therapist

happy marriage therapist, happy marriage, husband and wifeFinding a good happy marriage counselor or therapist can be the choice which saves your marriage. However, finding one that does not meet your needs can drive you further apart from your spouse, so it is important to find one that has the interest of your marriage at heart.
What is a Good happy Marriage Therapist?
A good marriage counselor is one who combines their education with experience in marital therapy. They should have the right credentials and have the proper license or certification that is required by your local government or authority which can be different depending on where you live.
However, even well qualified and experienced marriage counselors may not be the best ones to fit your needs. This means that you will need to schedule an initial interview session where you can talk with and get an idea of how this marriage counselor will work for your issues.
How Can We Find a Good happy Marriage Therapist?
The process of finding the right happy marriage therapist will require a little work and some research. A good way to start is having your friends or family recommend a marriage counselor that has worked for them.

While this can feel embarrassing and perhaps bring up issues that you wouldn’t normally discuss, if you are aware of someone who has used a marriage counselor before, then getting their recommendation offers a starting place. As mentioned, you will need to find someone fully qualified, experienced and educated.
Find Someone Local:

You will need to select a good happy marriage counselor that is close and convenient for you to visit. This is because you will need to see them over a number of sessions and missing them because the distance ruins the effect of their work.

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Once you have narrowed down the choices, at this point you can start setting up the initial interview session. This is where you meet and talk briefly with the happy marriage counselor who will tell you about themselves and what they hope to accomplish.
Ask Questions:

While it may seem a bit rude to ask questions, remember that you are trying to find the person who can best help your marriage so you will need to ask the right questions to get the best idea of what they are trying to accomplish. Your questions may include the following;
What is your role in helping us through this issue?
Have you worked with a couple of our age, situation or background before?
From what we’ve told you about our situation, what would be your next step?
Basically, you are trying to ferret out whether the marriage counselor has any bias beyond their interest in seeing you two get through this particular situation. Well trained couple counselors will not side with one person over the other.
You should interview at least three or more marriage counselors if possible before making your choice. Plus, recognize that even after you made your choice, the situation may change if the counselor is showing bias or is not valuing your opinions equally.

But overall, finding a good happy marriage counselor can save your marriage which leads to a happier future.

Things to Do if You are Not Happy in your Marriage

happy marriage, un happy in yourmarriageAt some point, most married couples will go through a period where one or both are not happy with the marriage. The signs may be subtle or quite strong, but in any event recognizing that you are not happy happy in your marriage is a good and first step towards solving this problem.
Unfortunately, many divorces could be avoided if a person who is unhappy in the marriage chose a course of action that will led to overcoming their unhappiness rather than just getting out of the marriage.

It’s understandable that feelings of unhappiness can drive someone to want to make such a change, but the truth is that most marriages actually grow stronger if they can find a way to deal with their feelings rather than leave.
Five Things to do when You are Not Happy with your Marriage
Here are five steps you can take which will help you overcome your unhappiness and stay in the marriage. Each of these steps will take a bit of courage on your part, but the result is certainly well worth the effort.

Identify the Problem:

What exactly is it that is making your marriage unhappy? You cannot communicate to your spouse unless you have a very strong idea of what it is. Take some time for self examination to reveal just what is causing your feelings.
Communicate Your Feelings from Your Point of View:

When you are unhappy in a marriage, your spouse should know about it. In fact, most spouses do know that something is wrong, but perhaps they didn’t want to verbalize it.

By communicating how you feel, it puts both of you on the same page. However, what you say should be from your point of view and not accusatory or inflaming such as, “I get angry when you do X.” when it should be, “I feel sad when I see you do X.” That tone allows your partner to engage and respond, not be pushed away.
While you cannot force your partner to change, you can focus on what could be done to help rectify the situation. I can start as small as “I’m going to hug you before I leave for work each day.” Such small gestures can really add up over time to bring more happiness to the marriage.
Cut Down on Distractions:

It is during these stressful times that we tend to get distracted because we are tired of feeling this way. While such thoughts are understandable, they pull away from working on the problem itself. Instead, you should be placing your relationship first and ditching the things that are pulling you away.
Get Professional Help:

A marriage therapist or couple counselor can provide a path towards pulling the marriage back together. A professional brings an outside viewpoint and can show you ways of communicating better with your spouse. This can bring the both of you closer together so that your can be happy in the marriage again.
Being unhappy in a marriage is a sure sign of something being wrong. The more quickly you recognize the problem and take action, the better and happier you’ll be in the long run.